Curious people's thoughts. I feel like I would transition if there were no societal consequences. If some people in society weren't judgmental and discriminating towards transgender people and if I knew my family would accept me then I'd probably transition. My feminine moments seem to outnumber my masculine (birth sex) moments. I would be happy presenting femininely in public (which I can do without transition, but there are challenges there too). So what does one do with that? Do you transition to be your true self despite the societal discrimination or do you stay in your birth sex (with some dysphoria/dissatisfaction) in order to avoid discrimination and hold on to male privilege? There are no easy answers here. As of right now, I;ve chosen the middle ground decision in the sense- to transition partially via low dose hormones. But I'm curious what everyone else thinks.
I have been thinking about it a lot and I want to do a full transition, even though I know there will be societal consequences and that my family and relatives might not accept me. I have just been preparing for it mentally and in other aspects as well, but I know it's going to be difficult for me, if my family don't support me. I can't really imagine not doing it either. Just thinking about not doing it makes me cry and if I imagine myself as male, then it fills me with so much joy. I just feel, that I would be happier that way, even if I have no support. I have lived 30 years not as my true self. I want to finally live the rest of my life, by being true to myself.
I'm kind of in the throes of this same decision myself. I'm 99.9% sure I'm losing the vast (and I mean vast) majority of my family and some friends. My main dilemna is I don't know if I'll be able to handle the pain of that on top of everything. I think I would almost without a doubt do full HRT and social transition if I knew I could handle it.
If there were no societal consequences, I'd have fully transitioned years ago - the absence of social judgement would have eliminated just about every fear I have regarding transition. And even though there is stigma, I still intend to go forward with it. It's a matter of honesty...after enough time, all of that pretending gets to you.
Societal consequences and the judgement of others kept me in denial about my gender for years! Back in the 1980s, 90s, even really right up to last decade trans people were generally seen as freaks, deviants etc. I mean, who would want to be one of those? But then 2020 happened. My partner died. Covid shook the whole snow globe up. Alone once more, I realised what I had my running away from, denying, all these years. So facing up to the fact I'm trans and always have been, I was presented with a question: can I live the rest of my life as my birth gender or do I transition? And for me, it was an easy choice - I have to be brave and be myself, whatever the consequences are. Snidi - it sounds like you're lucky in that you'll get bridging hormones which will take the edge of your dysphoria. Have those and see if you like the results, I guess? Like it often does in life, an answer to your question will gradually emerge. Beth
I think it’s legit to fear the consequences of giving up male privilege, given how many advantages it provides and the safety issues faced by cis women and trans feminine people. I can’t help wondering, too, whether there’s a touch of struggling to accept yourself based on how you fear you will be, or have been, treated. I say this because it’s taken me two years to stop judging myself by my family’s transphobic standards. At the same time, my own experience is that if there’s something gender-related which you need, there is only so long you can run away from it before your hand is forced. It may be that you just have to grasp the nettle, run with what you know and see what happens, as hard as that is.
