Just looking down at my profile here on EC where it says, "Out Status: Out to everyone" and damn. I did it. I really did it. How long did it take for me to get here? Just allowing myself a second to be proud of myself... and I am fucking proud of me.
there you go. take the slurs about us and make them work for us. takes the weapons away from those who bash us, intentionally or not.
I was playing apples to apples with some friends last night. Someone put the "Feminine" card down, and my best friend (the only person I've come out to) put down the "Toasters" card, looked at me, said "I was thinking you" and smiled. Made my day.
Yeah but those are way expensive compared to "regular" ones, and I already have these so why spend the money?
I woke up before dawn, fed and dressed myself, then took the bus to work. Shift lasted till noon. I got back to university and straightaway took a midterm in one of my hardest (though most beloved) classes. It is just a normal day, but it kind of hit me this morning that it is the first time in my life I've had to be absolutely independent and responsible for my actions, finances, time, health, et cetera. Being an "adult" is not a joke anymore. I am the only person responsible for myself now. It is... a foreign and bittersweet feeling.
I woke up this morning, my first words were; "good morning beautiful" and I smiled and started my day feeling excellent.
the six days I was in hospital in august everyone on the floor called me Sarah, and used my proper pronouns. it made a very trying time much more bearable.
I know how ya feel, I spent a lot of my childhood wishing I was a grown-up already. But when actually hit me that I am the only person responsible for me, I eather think back and feel really dumb, or think how great it would be to be a kid again, even for just a day.
So..... today was good. My boobs grew(I'm measuring in at a B cup now!!!!) and I'm actually debating if I even want to get implants, something I was so sure I wanted even just a few weeks ago, cause I'm actually pretty happy with hormones have given me(maybe just to get shape, I'm pretty sure I don't want bigger). Jenn (my boss) asked my opinion on a dress which made me feel awesome. And I totally passed from behind again!!!!!!