After having dated a younger guy and talking with a second I've come to realize that I would much rather prefer someone closer to my age. My problem with this though is I am to constantly run into the same problem when it comes to most younger guys which is pretty much being ignored. And it drives me nuts. I can't stand when I know I've sent a message to someone and rather than give even just a simple response they choose not to reply at all and ignore it. It doesn't bother me when I don't know the person at all but say in the middle of a conversation of someone does this to me it just seems mean/rude. Why not just say what's on your mind and give some sort of answer? Does anyone here have any experience with this? Or maybe you do it yourself and could give some sort of insight as to why? I've tried not letting it bug me but it just seems impossible if I want to keep my mind open to getting to know the person. If I detach myself so it doesn't then I've been told by others I seem like I'm not interested at all which drives people away.
As a general rule of thumb, I like to think that if a conversation on a site or app doesn't work out, then a relationship or whatever wasn't going to work out either. It's not about "saying the right thing" so that you "convince them to meet you." It's about testing the waters to see if it's a good idea. And, if they stop responding, then perhaps they're just saving the time and energy of continuing to test something that wasn't going to work out. That may not make you feel any better in the moment, but try not to be discouraged. Go ahead and appear interested/excited - it'll pay off eventually. Dating's not supposed to have a high success rate, after all. It only has to work once.
But I still don't quite understand what makes someone think that a person they've been having a conversation with suddenly isn't worth a response?
It's so easy to ignore someone digitally, on purpose or not (you probably have friends who are consistently poor responders). One way to counteract this is trying to arrange a meeting relatively soon so you make a real personal connection.
I normally try to meet up fairly soon after meeting someone worthwhile but some think it's a bit too pushy and I've been turned down a few times for it. Any ideas on how to do that? My friends happen to all know I'm the kind of person that even simply a response saying "Busy. I'll text later" is enough for me to be at ease with talking. I guess that's just something I'll have to keep working on personally too.
Honestly, there's no way of knowing. It's one of the particular frustrations of online dating, but there really isn't a way around it. They could have been nervous from the start and finally let it get the better of them. They could have met someone. They could be struggling to overcome some sort of relationship baggage. Or they could have found someone else willing to hook up that night. There are as many explanations as there are people - I think the important thing is just to try not to see it as a judgment on yourself.
