My sexuality is a huge issue for me. I'm embarrassed that I'm a gay bottom. I've been a bottom since high school. If a woman likes dick that's normal. But if a guy does, most people think that's nasty. I try to come out to people. I try to see how they feel about gay men first. Most say they think they're nasty. So I don't let them know I'm gay. I try to "look gay" and do gay stuff to kind of get it out there. People need to know I'm a gay or I'll never get any sex. I'm frustrated at not finding sexual companions. I like men my own age. I don't look for guys who look like models.
I don't think you should be embarrassed. I don't even know why you would be. As far as finding guys to meet up with, you could download an app on your phone like ******. That way your intentions would be clear... ---------- Post added 2nd Sep 2013 at 01:21 PM ---------- I feel like I should also encourage you to use protection.
I was out last night and a guy was talking to me. I was attracted to him. I saw another guy I liked. If these were women you could flirt with them. But, these were men so it's not normal to come on to them outside of a gay venue. I guess I need a tactful way to do it. As far as protection, I have been pretty good about it. No STD so far and I get tested at least once a year.
Please don't be embarrassed . You are who you are. I have bottomed recently and found it quite enjoyable. I am not embarrassed about it at all. Enjoy your life and make the best of it. There are many men out there for you. Maybe you should broaden your search a little. I don't know your age but perhaps unless you are really young you could seek some guys a little older than you. Say ten or twenty years. I am an older guy and find that I have a lot of choices in my age group. And have met some excellent guys. Keep trying you are normal.:icon_bigg
I've heard that it's a bit more common in Mexico to have the mindset of "gay top = OK, gay bottom = perverted". But if you think about it, it doesn't make much sense. What good is being a gay top if there's nobody to top FOR? Lex
Well, can't offer any advice of my own from the gay male over 50 perspective, but I do think all of us in the "Later in Life" forum need to find a way to get over ourselves. From what I can see of my son's gay friends in the 18-20 age bracket, there are no such compulsions to hide their true desires. When one of his friends (also, btw a Mexican native) came into my home wearing an "UKE" armband and I asked him what it signified, he swiftly rattled off every vernacular for "bottom" that has ever been coined, and possibly a few of his own creation. I agree with Lex, even if that is the most commonly held belief in your region, that would have to mean that you sir are bound to be in high demand. So strut your stuff and show them your worth!
I am 63 years of age and just joined the ranks of gay America.My wife and few friends know and there is grief that goes with it.I am a strict bottom.I have had only two gay situations so far.I too was embarrassed but when I think of the pleasure I had gotten and gave it makes it worth it.My wife thinks that counseling will fix what is wrong with me.I enjoy satisfying a mans cock and that is it.I am gay.For now I have to carefully pick my targets.
Before life happened and knocked me back in the closet temporary (long story but is in the thread I started here) I was out to most of my friends and thats a question almost all of them asked me I told them that what I do in the bedroom and with who is private. There is no need to tell people if you top/bottom unless you are having sex with them (or considering it). ---------- Post added 3rd Sep 2013 at 04:07 PM ---------- I usually keep my life private but here I'll make an exception. Whats wrong with being a bottom? Most of the time I'm just into trading oral (would rather trade I don't like 69) but after I get to know someone a bit better (read as build trust) I usually am a bottom (still not that often) I almost never top. It's just not my thing.
Thank Gawd for bottoms! If you weren't, what would us tops do, sit around and discuss the weather and favorite lubes? Shit, be proud mi amigo! It takes two to tango!
I am not sure how others feel, but personally, I STOPPED trying to scope out peoples feelings toward gays before coming out to them, it only hinders the process and makes more loops to jump through. Somehow, perhaps through counseling, try to build your confidnece and level of self love and acceptance so that you do not feel you have to "interview" people for their approval. Slowly, try to develop a mindset of you own your life, other people own their life and they can take it or leave it. I only say this because I used to always try to speculate about peoples views and figure them out before revealing that I am gay and it just go to be too mentally exhausting.
