Thinking back now I had like crushes on guys and found them attractive ever since I can remember but I just thought that was how everyone felt about their freinds, I didn't really understand my feelings for them I guess. It wasn't really until I was about 13 that I realised that I liked those guys as more than friends.
I don't even know... I'm sure some part of me knew all through high school. I remember telling myself I would get married and have kids and then come out, so I think I must have known. But I definitely convinced myself it was jealousy or admiration, not attraction at least in middle school.
I've known since the beginning if high school that I was not straight. It took me a while to figure out that I was bisexual though. But when I figured it out, I looked back through my life and realized that I had had crushes on both sexes. I'm just now coming out.
I remember always being rather enamored of other women, but I thought that was something that all girls did, until I came across the concept of bisexuality when I was about 12. I then realized taht I was probably bi. I told a few people and didn't get the best reaction so that sent me right back into the closet. At nineteen though, after years of having very little attraction to anyone, I fell in love with another girl. I realized then that I was most likely a lesbian. I'm only now coming to terms with it though, because I tried to be straight for about 4 years.
When I started masturbating to gay porn in the summer after 6th grade. (I started masturbating to straight porn when I was 16, ironically, but I do this much less often). I'm still in the closet, partly because I have dated women and found the relationships to be emotionally and sexually satisfying, but I definitely lean more towards gay than bi, at least sexually. I guess there were some signs when I was a little kid. I liked to play with Barbies (although this could have been because my best friend from the house next to us was a girl and I would always go over to her house and we, along with her sister, would play with Barbies). Also, when I was about 5, I had this crazy theory that little boys grew up to be women and little girls grew up to be men, which I told my mom at that age. Also, the first time I watched porn with my friends in 6th grade, I remember not liking lesbian porn, but at the time I had no idea why. I honestly don't remember if I were looking at the guy or the girl in porn at that point.
I have no real cemented idea on mine. I was twelve approaching thirteen, I had kissed a girl, but it felt odd, so I starting thinking about guys and if it would feel weird or more satisfying to kiss them instead of girls. But how I was going to know? I tricked a guy into coming with me to somewhere private and I kissed him there. He didn't appreciate it (and I don't know what I was thinking, he wasn't that attractive), but I loved it and it felt so right and special. Of course, I denied I was gay after that and kept up with any pretense that I was going to grow up and straighten out, perving on women and falling in love with them and all that stuff. Yet it never did and I kept having gay thoughts afterwards in high school, even though I identified as straight or asexual at that point. Only during my GCSEs or so did I realise that I was in fact gay. It's taken me a while to come out, but I'm almost there. That's genius.
The first real inkling was probably late in high school when I developed a mini-crush on at least one guy in one of my classes. At the time I don't think I processed it as such, though. But, even before that, I'm pretty sure that when I started watching porn I was always subconsciously more focused on the guys more than the girls. It took a LONG time for me to realize that I had sexual interest in other guys beyond mere "curiosity" about fellow males. It was towards the end of college that the desire became obvious.
I personally only realized in April of this year... but when I look back, I think it was obvious. Of course I had thoughts that I might be as early as well, like, 11-12. Only I denied it and rejected that part of myself... hell, that might've been a major part of my depression was me rejecting myself. Anyway, I realized when I was 16 and a half or so, and I'm turning 17 later this month. Came out last month
When I was quite young (in primary school), I remember thinking that only girls could be beautiful and I didn't get how girls could like guys. But then when I was 11 or 12 I got this crush on a boy in my English class and I only really thought about guys but it took me a while to realise that wasn't what other guys thought about and it wasn't til I was about 14/15 that I accepted that I liked guys and it was a phase. But I never really thought about what that meant as it wasn't really a huge part of my life. It's only fairly recently that I've seen myself as gay and started wanting to do anything about it. That makes me a very slow developer I guess.
When I was a kid (not even 10 yet) I would occasionally see a boy and, for some reason, feel like I wanted to be friends with him. I remember thinking in the back of my head thinking they were cute, but I never addressed those thoughts. I didn't pay any attention to boys in middle school because they were all jerks (I can't actually think of a word strong enough to describe them), so I'd ignore them as much as I could. There may have been a few I thought were cute, but I never paid attention. In high school those thoughts became a little more graphic, which is when I actually started to actively deny any such feelings. It wasn't until about five months ago I started to realize I wasn't straight, and only about a month ago I started to consider that I might be gay and not bi.
i guess it was about 12. when my first time watched porn, i thought i liked it cuz the hot actress, but i found i was attracted by the actor and actress both sometimes i thought men are much sexier than women.
I feel like I've answered this before, but I don't see the reply flag that's on everything I have posted on, so.... here goes! I figured it out pretty early on, like 11 or 12. The way I realized it was rather interesting. I knew I liked looking at boys, but at that age I thought I was just comparing faces body types, etc. When I started sneaking across the basement to get the encyclopedias labeled "M," "D," and "S," for Michelangeo, David, and the Sistine Chapel respectively, because they had pictures of the art, I kinda figured it went beyond comparison. Admittedly, I didn't figure out the actual name of the orientation for a while, but I had already had it ingrained in me by my parents/church that only guy/girl relationships were good, and all others were bad... *sigh*
I was reading a book and it had a character who was lesbian and I started thinking... I couldnt get the idea out of my head and then i just kept thinking about it and i was like yea thats me im gay... i really should have realzed before! haha so manyclues!
Interesting question. Looking back now i remember liking a boy in the fifth grade. I didn't know why but I just liked looking at him and being close to him. After that it pretty much faded away and I didn't think about it at all during high school. I suppose I subconsciously thought it was a phase or whatever. I was about 19 or 20 when I first started seriously thinking about what it meant for my future. As recently as last year I questioned whether I was realy gay, but then I tried to remember whether I ever felt about a woman the way i've felt about some of the guys inn my life and I never have. I can look at a beautiful woman and appreciate her beauty, but some men make me really feel something. If I smile at a cute guy and he smiles back it's like little butterflies of happiness are smoking pot in my stomach and becoming deliriously happy.
Indeed, good question. I think that I've always known that something was different about me, but I think I attributed it entirely to my personality and gender expression and didn't consider sexuality. Growing up, I was much more quiet and bookish than other boys and believed that was what distinguished me from them. It wasn't until adolescence that I realized that my sexual orientation was an additional factor.
around 11 when I first realised how attracted I was to topless boys with 6pac abs. At 13 I realised that instead of fighting myself if i liked females or males more that i'm just bisexual
Well, I was about 9 I had a weird facination with guy's.. So it was about when I was 10-11 that I came out and decided to say I was gayx3
I started to check guys out when once I hit puberty. It took a few years after that to realize I was gay. now that I look back on my childhood I can see some things that could point to me being gay, but I wonder if these things only stand out now that I admit I'm gay. I mean I did have a steady girlfriend in kindergarten haha.
