If this is the answer...what is the question?

Because you never carry an umbrella.

A dove grey top hat, a strand of pearls, a crushed perfume bottle

 

What has Bertie Trump failed to use as sex toys?

Well, if you have to ask...I was always the one to do EXACTLY as I was told...So that is how Jimmy came to be.

 

Why do you have a son?

Waffle batter

 

I have run out of whipped cream? What can I lick off your body now?

A rolling pin, the underside of the carpet and two pieces of paper.

 

Hello, 911? My husband just got his d*ck stuck in a pipe! What do I use to get him out?!


A coconut.

 

Damn it...Dildo broke...What else could I try?

Well, of course we COULD do that. But I rather would not...

 

Why don't we just shoot him in the head? :O

I can't. I can't. It's just wrong, Charles!

 

Do you want to steal his Dildo?




You cant force me to do it

 

Are you sure you don't want to f*ck Chris Evans?

I think that's a horrible idea.

 

Why don't we cover these electronic waffles in chocolate?

Yes! I absolutely hate it!

 

Don't you hate it when waffles rebel.


No! Chris Evans is MY MAN.

 

I guess Chris is mine now, right?


That question made me 50% dumber.

 

What do pineapples drink for desert?


There are 5 green apples hanging from the tree.

 

How many apples are hanging from the tree, kids?

NO. No, no, no. Just... no.

 

Want to have sex with Miley Cyrus?

Well, finally! You should have asked before! Of course we can dear.

 

You wanna get a divorce?

Yes, I set my hair on fire for fun.

 

Did you take the matches for what I think you did, again?

My ass, my back, my gosh!

 

Do you ever wonder what Dorothy (from the Wizard of Oz) says when she finishes having sex...?

Oh! Don't stop! DON'T STOP!

... :roflmao:!

 

Can I put it in there for once?

Well now then! This IS where I want it!

 

I'm putting your books in the top right shelf because I'm pretty sure this is where you want it, ok?

No! Please! I'll do anything!