I found this quiz on Reddit, thought it looked interesting. My results were a little off what I was expecting but not massively. https://sexvalues.github.io/
I think the way the test is written will produce masculine-favouring attractiveness results if the "I like penis" question is answered positively. There's no equivalent question about females to balance the survey. Have you taken the quiz @tallslenderguy ?
Well I couldn't get the chart to display but 92.9 feminine Medium sex drive 66.7 dominant 71.4 vanilla 75 affection Hypothetically speaking anyway.
i haven't taken the quiz. Just finished my rotation at the hospital so i have some time off now, i'll check it out and post the results.
78.6% Attraction Masculine leaning 75% High Sex drive 75% Submissive 65.6% Deviance-Kinky 56.2% Affection-Neutral i don't think the 'test' is complex enough to measure individuality? For instance, i'm a very romantic guy, but i perceive romance/affection in a pretty non standard way.
Yeah I don't think there were quite enough questions to pick up on nuance. I think my masculine/feminine preference scores should be reversed really. The question about muscular bodies, I didn't take that to be masculine/feminine but I think the test author probably does. I love a really honed, athletic female physique. And I don't think I have a 97th percentile sex drive. Maybe 80-85% feels right, its always pretty strong but sometimes can be less. I think I'm naturally a little more dominant than submissive but 50/50 doesn't feel far off, but my score of 60/40 sub/dom doesn't feel right on reflection.
me either. Visually, i'm attracted to lean, smooth guys Who are wired Top/Dom... sort of Dom/Top 'twink,' which contradicts the common stereotype: i.e. Muscles and hairy= masculine, Top, Dom, lean and smooth = feminine, bottom, sub. But reality is different, lots of variations and infinite combinations. my sex drive is maybe a bit higher, but it's very connected to my Mates. i respond to His drive. Which is not to say i don't have my own, independent drive... it's there, but it's also connected to the submissive part of my nature that wants my 'dirve' owned/possessed/controlled by my Top. (Laughing) this test could not possibly pick up any of that and deliver an accurate picture.
Hairy is really not my cup of tea either. Its something I don't mind now, but in my teens & early 20s I found any hair a bit of a turn off. I still don't find anything attractive about it really, but it doesn't bother me like it used to. Is that a dislike of a masculine feature? I'm not sure. Men are hairier than women but I don't think its particularly a masculine/feminine thing. Women can be pretty hairy, just generally it isn't everywhere like on a man. My fiance keeps his back smooth and chest either smooth or cropped and he's a pretty stereotypical masculine guy. Muscular physiques I like on both men and women, but a woman is always going to be way less muscular and defined for the same effort. Male levels of muscles on a woman is not attractive to me, but I have massive respect for the achievement and maybe in the moment I wouldn't find it unattractive in the same way as I dislike that physique in photos? I think it plays into my attraction for competence/drive and dislike for laziness in a partner. With women, building/maintaining a good body takes far more effort and also you have to overcome society's expectation of women to not be strong/fit/athletic in order to build a really good physique, especially if you are naturally skinny or put on weight easily. For a normal woman, just walking into the free weights room in an average gym is a tougher proposition than for a man. But then with women, I like pretty much all body types. A toned body is super attractive but most women I've been with haven't been like that and I still couldn't get enough of them. There is something about that hourglass shape that always catches my attention, not sure if it is attraction or jealousy! I've never had that and when I was younger I didn't think I had an attractive body. I don't have anything like a pin-up physique, I'm built like a short Keira Knightly. If I had a body like Scarlett Johanssen I might not have felt the need to work so hard in the gym. I think I know what you mean about responding to a partner's sex drive. My fiance initiating is almost always a turn on, even if I don't feel in the mood to begin with. More often it is me that initiates things though, and historically with women it has almost always been me. I think when it comes to women, I enjoy being the one who initiates and takes the lead.
Love this, thank you for sharing. i think it is so good and healthy to discuss stuff like this openly, and show that diversity is normal, not deviant. i used to be turned off by hairy. On me, it 'feels' less sub. i'm not a gorilla, but have a fair amount. i find gay guys split about 50/50 on hair vs smooth. It's not an identity factor for me, i can go either way with my body and remove it, or not, depending on what turns my Top on. i can chose without violating anything in myself. But a Guy Who want's me smooth accesses something extra in me that a Guy Who wants me hairy does not. As to my Top? Same. my sexuality goes way beyond the physical and i'm very much into 'mind fuck.' i've had a FB for 4 years Who is pretty much physically opposite of many of my visual turn ons. He's got a very ripped physique, big muscles everywhere. He's also hairy everywhere. But His personality is what i term "affectionate" or "subtle" Dom/Top, and that trumps almost everything else with me and opens and controls my desire like nothing else. He's Bi, and only wants/needs certain things with me, and i'm grateful for what we have... but if He was inclined, it could be exponentially more. i don't think He has much of an idea of the power He wields with me. i go to the gym every other day and do what i call my "skinny white boy routine." Mostly, i want an ass that attracts a Top Man Who needs/wants that. i quip that i am not ripped, maybe slightly torn. i'm tall, lean and toned, but don't want a heavily muscled body, it doesn't feel bottom/sub or receptive to me. i want Guys to feel welcome and big muscles feel more like "cock" or penetrative to me. There are several women that frequent the gym i go to, and there is a subset that uses the free weights. i watched one Woman Who i see frequently and is very built from lifting. She had a guy with her and was training Him to lift. Was really cool to see, decided reversal from heteronormative. i live in a university town, and there is a decided liberal undercurrent, so not unusual to see people stepping outside heteronormative. Funny story. There was a doctor practicing at the hospital where i work. i had a secret crush on him for some time. i had not seen him for awhile and came back on rotation one day to discover they had transitioned and that who i thought was 'he' was 'she.' i had a Victor Victoria moment. i was so impressed by her courage to have worked and presented as male for so many years and to stay at the same facility when she transitioned. As a male, they were quiet and sort of shy, but when she transitioned, she was bold, open. It was very cool to see.
To an extent, yeah. I'm aware that it's something of an intrusive worry. I expect it'll come up now and again but that's to be expected. I've come a long way in terms of dealing with some related underlying trauma (that I won't get into since this is a light-hearted thread). Anyway, I don't expect that my attitude will change overnight. It'll take time. I need to get out of my head somewhat. Take a step back.
I find discussing things helps me a lot with controlling the needs of that side of me.... Although last night, my fiance went to bed at 11 and I stayed up because I was totally engrossed in reading a lesbian romance mini-book. I told him I'd be up shortly, but it ended up being 2.30am before I finally dragged myself away from the tablet. The story really hit hard - straight girl meets lesbian playing sports, there's a rivalry and dislike initially, but they become friends. Her straight relationship is unfulfilling but she doesn't know why. The two women get closer, sparks fly. I really felt like I could connect with the protagonist and went to bed feeling a bit melancholy. I'm not suggesting my relationship is unfulfilling, as it totally isn't. The 'straight side' of me couldn't be happier. But there definitely feels like there's something missing in my life. It's not the main piece of the puzzle by any means but its a noticable lack of.... something. Not just physical either.
If you ever want a permanent solution to the hair thing, laser is fantastic. I had some done years ago, and had probably no more than 5% regrowth since then. A home IPL kit has mostly taken care of that. It beats shaving or waxing hands down. Although it is expensive, I wouldn't have been able to afford it but I got it for mate's rates. I've had to put serious effort into lower body to look good in jeans. You men don't realize how easy you have it when it comes to building muscle. I don't know how I'd feel about training a man, would be probably feel a little weird training someone who can probably outlift me from day one. I'm training 4 women at the moment, all weight-loss goals but I think free weights play a big part in looking good in the mirror, not just making the number on the scale go down.
Good to hear you're making progress. I know all about intrusive worries, not on the same subject as you but those doubts that you just can't shake. If you ever want to send me a message, feel free. Happy to help if I can.
One of the reasons i think it's healthy to discuss who and how we are, to bring all that outside the closet, is i think it demonstrates that normalcy. So many social norms are only "normal" for some, and not all. Being different isn't abnormal, it's status quo. What's abnormal is ego/ethnocentrism that assumes everyone is the same and should live in some standardized way. i don't think it's ever "just physical." That's another heteronormative notion, that i think has religious underpinnings, that sex and physical expression can only be exercised in certain context. i think the notion that a physical connection with another person can be "just physical" is an illusion, that we cannot somehow disconnect the cognitive and emotional parts of our self and make something "just" physical, that there is always need/desire driving, or at least is passenger on the ride. i think the effort or assumption to fragment our physical self from the rest of us keeps us from fully experiencing and understanding our self and each other.
i'd really like the laser choice. i've done waxing and IPL, as well as shaving and hair remover. Shaving is a no go on the behind, razor rash big time. really hard to wax your own behind. IPL is fairly effective, but tedious. i do a lot of staring at the gym... i wonder at the number of guys who have these incredible glutes and are straight? i wonder if they have any idea how crazy that drives gay guys like me. i go to the gym and pine my whole work out.
