Hi! Okay, my problem might seem a little bit... for lack of better wording right now, "silly". I identify as genderqueer whilst leaning more to presenting myself to society as more masculine than feminine (I'm biologically female), but I'm having trouble finding resources as I'm more on the plus-sized end of the weight-scale with a rather curvy figure. I'm struggling to find resources on how to present myself the way I feel because of this hideously curvy body of mine. (Hah, I've tried losing weight, but it just make it worse) I do, however, have height on my side (5' 11") but I don't think it helps much. I'm still quite baby-faced too which I think gives the game away even more. (A friend of mine said it's easier to look more masculine with defined cheekbones and everything) It's really starting to get me down about not being able to present myself the way I feel inside. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
One thing that helped me before I started on T was to pad my figure with undershirts. This helped hide my curvy figure, but it really sucked if it was hot outside that day. Also, this site may help you out some as well.
For me, personally, I've started wearing looser clothing so my shape is less obvious. In addition I've gotten a more gender neutral haircut and started wearing glasses (I don't need them but they give my face a more manly shape). Really though it's all about playing around and seeing what you think makes you look most like you feel on the inside.
I'm slender, but I have wide hips and large breasts, so I'm not entirely certain if my advice will help. But, on underworks, they sell binders for your chest, but also compression shorts which will lower the curvaceousness of your hips to achieve a more masculine waist. I suggest you get both of these things because they will help, and wear a shirt a size up to cover the rest of the curves that aren't concealed. A lot of masculine leaning people tend to avoid this, but have you considered using makeup? You can use it to give your cheekbones and such definition to make your face look more masculine. I have a very babyish face too and contouring helps a lot.
I see. It may be time to go shopping for more suitable clothing then. And take the plunge and get a haircut along with wearing my glasses like I'm supposed to. Thank you for the advice! :icon_bigg Any advice is helpful! I own a few binders, but I've never really thought about compression shorts - I'll certainly look into them. On the make-up note, I do try to use it. I'm still learning how to contour properly, but I'm hoping I'll get there soon. Thank you for your advice! :icon_bigg
You might think about nutrition... eating more whole grain, cereals, and avoiding high sugar drinks and too much salt, which helps with retention of water in the body... maybe even more vegetarian, and with fruits... an apple for example consists mostly of water. You might think about doing regular exercises you like... walking, swimming, biking... not overdoing it, just a few times a week, and having fun meanwhile... there are a lot of clothing choices... reducer bras... sports bras... http://emptyclosets.com/forum/gender-identity-expression/159635-breast-binder.html?highlight=binding playing with different clothing colours and styles... (*hug*)
What a friend... *scowl* I know some people who pass better when their faces are fuller because it disguises bone structure differences, if that makes sense. Try to find a hair dresser who will work with you/who understands your needs. It's not always about how defined your cheekbones are. Just find a look that works for you. I'm somewhat curvy and I find dark colors and layering really helps. I almost always have either a buttondown or a hoodie or a sweater thrown over a t-shirt. Graphic tees in dark colors are great. Don't listen to your party pooper friend. Do what makes you feel comfortable. (*hug*)
I find this a little strange too. The skeletal differences between average male and average female is very slight and cheekbones are generally more noticeable on females. Males tend to have sharper cheekbones though, but they're generally not as noticeable.
I eat a lot of fruit (It's yummy) But I do have a weakness for sugary drinks (gdi, Lucozade) so hopefully cutting back on them will help. And maybe it is time to get back into exercising. Thank you for your advice! That's pretty reassuring - I was worried my face being fuller would make it more obvious that I'm "trying" to be a guy at this stage. Ha, I'm sure my friend probably meant well, but I was kinda worried about it. Hopefully taking the plunge and getting my hair cut will help too. I think this was one of my main problems. Thank you for your advice! (*hug*) Until cheekbones were mentioned to me, I didn't really think about them being important to looking more masculine at all. (and then I got worried, haha....)
Totally! Glad I'm not alone on this. If anything I might associate prominent cheekbones with feminine faces... anyways I don't want this to get into a discussion about "passing" or looking more masculine/feminine. I just meant to point out that OP's friend's comment might be a form of fat shaming which has nothing to do with reality and made OP feel bad unnecessarily.
To be honest (without trying to sound melodramatic) it did cross my mind that she might be making a dig at my weight. (I'm the chubby one out of my friends, which has its merits and downsides) But thank you to both of you - I feel reassured that my non-visible cheekbones aren't really a problem anymore. (*hug*)