I really want to just go to sleep and not wake back up again. I want peace in my head and I just want to start over. I don't know what to do anymore and I'm tired of forcing myself through life like I'm ok when I'm really, really not ok...
Made the mistake of wearing a guy shirt with my mom around. So she's giving me shit about looking butch and how "it's not a good look for you, you're too feminine for that" and "I mean it as a compliment, you're a pretty girl." No. Fuck, mom. I'm not a "pretty girl". I never wanted this.
Time to go to bed. Earlier than I have for a while, but there we go. I'm fed up of today and don't really care whether or not I wake up tomorrow.
Yay!! Hope all goes well, I'm planning to come out to my parents also...in 23 days or before I go off to school!! So...good luck!!
This. If this is about thinking a lot I can relate; thinking is all I do. I really hope you feel better! Also, comments on the internet really dishearten me sometimes. I had been looking at some funny YouTube videos that happened to be done by lesbians and the amount of hate comments were appalling. It's just a constant reminder that people will find reasons to belittle and hate one another and it makes me really sad.
Honestly, that's why I don't do anything in this house. Folks ask me to do stuff and then they do it for me. God, they spoil me sometimes and other times they don't. I hate it...I want out of this house NOW!!
My mom's trying to make a big deal out of graduation. Can I just get it over with? Get out of here? She's celebrating someone who was never there. See if she even bothers to care about me when she learns the truth...