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Why am I always jealous when I see people in love?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Joe2001, Sep 2, 2018.

  1. Joe2001

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    I've noticed this for a while now that every time I see relatively young people in love (talking about late teens and 20's and either gay or straight couples), I get very jealous of them.

    It happens whenever I am in public or even when I am watching movies.

    Why is this? Maybe it is a signal that I should get a boyfriend?
     
  2. Fishtail

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    Humanity tend to envy/get jealous what they don't have.
    But we shouldn't obsess too much on what we want&don't have or
    we can loose focus on the good stuff&people that we have in life.
    Cuz what we want isn't alway what we really need. :thinking:
     
  3. DragonBoys

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    Thanks for this. i'm feeling the same way, ESPECIALLY when I see teens and early twenty-somethings in love because it's exactly what I don't have and it's been eating me up inside for so long. So, I'm trying to push past it and focus on what I do have and cherishing my friends and myself more. I'm still a little shaky, but I'm getting there.
     
  4. Fishtail

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    No problemo.
    "If you want to forget the stressful environment(job/family) by dating somebody,
    can only feel happiness in a intimate relationship,
    or depend your selfworthy only on a partner;
    are you not being unfair and unhealthy to youself?";
    Is what I'm always thinking when i see singles in my city vent/argue with others about it.

    And should anything else fail, just watching cute&funny animals video
    is proven to reduce stress and overthinking of students before exams.
     
    #4 Fishtail, Sep 2, 2018
    Last edited: Sep 2, 2018
  5. Joe2001

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    Glad that someone else feels the same. I suppose I should focus on what I do have, but it will always make me jealous.
     
  6. Joe2001

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    I do agree with that. It's just a bit stressful seeing everyone else with someone that they love, while I still haven't got anyone and have 0 chances doing so. But as you say, maybe best to focus on the good in my life.
     
  7. Joe2001

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    I do wonder how so many people who are young find love. I barely know any guys around my age outside of those at my school.
     
  8. Thomas094

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    It will happen when it is time - sadly we don't get what we want when we want it but more so when we are ready to accept and appreciate it!

    In the meantime use imagination and fanaticize !
     
  9. Joe2001

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    What do you mean in terms of that?
     
  10. Thomas094

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    I guess don't get caught up in what you see others have so much - it will come to you when you are ready. In the meantime embrace it mentally what you want and what you want it to look and feel like- that is all I meant Good luck
     
  11. Devil Dave

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    There is no shame in being single. Embrace your freedom!
     
  12. Jude B

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    I have this problem so hard! XD
    I'm in the middle of reading this webtoon called "Always Human," which I 1000% recommend. Anyway, it has this most adorable little lesbian couple in it and I'm so jealous of that! I really would like to have a relationship like that.
    But, at the same time, I understand that those sorts of relationships take proper chemistry and patience. Still though!
     
  13. Joe2001

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    I didn't say that, but I suppose it's more about what you want. I'm 16 so am at an age where I desire having a relationship. I don't think that is unreasonable. Also, as I live with parents, it's not like I have that much freedom anyway. I certainly don't want to still have no relationship experience when I am 20.
     
  14. Joe2001

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    Was walking through Glasgow earlier on and saw a guy from my school meeting his 2nd girlfriend in a year. He's not necessarily an extrovert. I'm don't even have a single friend, except for some people I chat with online.

    I know there are pros and cons to relationships, but it's too hard not to be envious in that sort of situation.
     
    #14 Joe2001, Sep 4, 2018
    Last edited: Sep 4, 2018
  15. Destin

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    Being forced to be around other people for long periods of time mostly. The thing about love is that it's very subjective and there's different levels of it. If you put 5 girls and 5 guys in the same house for a year with not much outside contact, it's nearly guaranteed at least 6 are going to become couples in love when if they were released into the normal world they'd probably have no interest at all in each other - the less options a person has the easier love happens. At your age this is mostly in clubs and social groups.

    Try not to be too hung up on stuff like this - although he might have multiple girlfriends, it doesn't mean he's happy with any of them. The vast majority of high school relationships I've seen, including mine, are basically just for sex and neither person actually cared much about or even liked their boyfriend/girlfriend. It's a convenient way to explore sexuality and nothing more for most teens. The 'real' relationships tend to start around people's early 20's when the novelty of physical stuff only wears off and they want a real connection instead.
     
  16. Joe2001

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    Well, I know from watching this guy and his 1st girlfriend, there was a genuine connection. He even acknowledged her in a speech he did once. Of course some teens use it as a way to explore sexuality, but you might be surprised that quite a number do genuinely seem to connect with each other. I, for one, would never enter a superficial relationship just to have sex. To me, that defeats the whole concept of love.
     
    #16 Joe2001, Sep 4, 2018
    Last edited: Sep 4, 2018
  17. Devil Dave

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    why not? why does it matter that you have some relationship experience before you reach that particular age?
     
  18. Joe2001

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    Having relationships is part of life. It's not unreasonable to want to be in a loving relationship with somebody. We are humans - social creatures after all.

    It's not for everyone, but it is for many.
     
  19. Kasey

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    Because some of us are unlucky in love and want that same loving feeling and to share our lives on a more intimate level with others. I've had 3 really bad relationships in my life for different reasons. I would rather be alone than chained down but I just want to find someone who loves me for me and wants to share in life and not be downright nutty.
     
  20. Devil Dave

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    Nobody is saying its unreasonable to want a relationship, but you're being a bit unreasonable to yourself for not being in one. You said in one reply on this thread that you have "0 chance" of meeting someone. You're still young. There are still plenty of opportunities ahead - college/university, all the different jobs you're going to be doing, pubs and clubs that you're going to start going to once you're old enough to drink. There's really no need to pressure yourself.