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When did you come out?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by HeFleBiGen, Aug 8, 2018.

  1. ECMember

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    Indirectly came out to my parents. I was in a psych hospital in mid June 2016. I had told my dad in a phone call I had from my unit to check my Gmail for any job leads I had. I was applying to a few federal(civilian) employment through USAJOBS. Anyway, my dad had snopped a bit too much and noticed I had some replies from some men from Craigslist. He later told the psychiatrist and social worker assigned to me at the hospital. And made some bullshit up that there were grown men that were truck drivers and claimed I had "solicited men" over Craigslist. He based this reasoning from some men that had sent pictures of their dicks in my inbox. For anyone that wants to know, I did not meet grown men off Craigslist. I admit I may have published posts back when it was available of seeking platonic/friendships of guys near my age. And I did make a post of occassionally seeking some hook up with a guy near my age. I may have some grown men that are too ignorant to read basic English and not read when a post says a specific age range that one is looking for.

    I did make a brief reference to my dad(he has since forgotten this) in June 2016 in a phone call that I did "meet guys on campus... and it was safe." Which that was truth. I used a "hook up app" on campus to meet guys near my age. They weren't perverts or ex-cons or felons or any creeps. They were younger than me(and of legal age) and collleg age. All except one lived on campus and it was safe.

    I did mention to my mom that I was curious/bi leaning back in the Fall of 2015 and she somewhat freaked the hell out. My mom was raised Catholic in the 1950s and 1960s and she clings to her Catholic identity. When she learned of that "Craiglist incident" I believe she told some elderly Mexican American woman that sews for her about me and she had prayed for me about it.

    A friend I know at my college that's in recovery like me I mentioned about my bi curiousity/bi sexuality feelings and he was okay about it. And a few other people.

    I told one of my sisters about my first same sex experience(Not in detail, I'm not a pervert) and she just said to be safe. So she's the only one of out of my nuclear family that's liberal in terms of LGBTQ respect/rights.


    At the moment, my parents and I aren't really discussing my sexuality as a main issue.
     
  2. LaurenSkye

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    I haven't yet come out to my family, but publicly I have been slowly changing my appearance over the past few years.
     
  3. Gear2BQueer

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    almost 2 years ago... November 20, 2016 I came out to my friend at the time and my parents and sister. It was terrifying and I know there is still a lot of coming out to do, and possibly to my parents again cause we don't talk about it so it feels like they forgot.
     
  4. DragonBoys

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    I unintentionally came out to my mom first as biromantic when I was talking about a bisexual female original character of mine. I tried explaining to her that diversity and representation is important in media and she just thinks that's me trying to come out. I didn't use that character as a means to come out but whatever. I'm lowkey regretting it because she's one of those people who has a hard time understanding that a person can be attracted to men, women, and nonbinary folk at the same time, but it's just whatever. That and I came out to both my sisters-in-law and my brothers whom I think they give me certain looks haha

    I also tried coming out as asexual to her and was immediately met with typical acephobic responses such as "You just haven't found the right person" and "Sex is a beautiful, natural thing" (I also explained I was sex-repulsed too but whatever omg), then when I tried coming out as non-binary, she said I was "confused" and a "he-she" so there's that :slight_smile:

    Fortunately, my friends are A LOT more accepting. Some may not quite fully understand my orientation, but that's ok because at least they're accepting
     
  5. theamos13

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    Bi - About 5 years ago to myself and my therapy group. About a year ago to my wife and select friends.
     
  6. Amo616

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    I've come out to my friends as pansexual about a year ago. They were very accepting. Haven't come out to anyone about being genderfluid yet, except to whoever's reading this. Don't know how my family is going to react to me being a genderfluid pansexual, but whatever. P.S.- This is just a tip for bisexual, pansexual, etc. people. If someone of the same sex is ever hitting on you and you don't like them, say your not gay. They almost immediately stop. If they ask if you're curious, day that you are confident in your sexuality. Just a tip that I find useful. It is also a good tip because you don't have to lie and you don't hurt their feelings too much.
     
  7. Kasey

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    To the first person? Like 4 years ago. To most people. By that I mean the school and community I teach in was a little over a year and a half and... to the rest of my family literally in the next day/today as letters should start arriving.

    I'm terrified about how this will be received.
     
  8. Renegades

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    The first time I came out was March, 2015 when I was in 8th grade to my best friend. I told my mom the June after, and didn't come out to another friend till the September after. The December of that year I came out to my entire friend group from middle school, and I slowly came out to a few friends in 9th grade, and in 10th I sort of cannonballed out of the closet at school. Not too long ago, I came out to my aunt, my dads sister and she was even more supportive than I ever could've asked for. My mom is the biggest fan, so to have my aunt be so OK with who I am really makes the knowledge of how disapproving my mom's family would be seem less awful.
     
  9. lonewolf79

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    Back in 2005, age 25.
     
  10. jenne

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    i never actually came out like " you know what? i'm gay"
    i was a slow process.. i never was obsessed with boys i never cared much so and started saying in front of my friends"this girl is hot or beautiful " and then i would probably mention a girl that i met and i like and i would like to go out with her
    they are totally fine with that and it's a smart way to "come out"
    i didn't make it seem like a big deal so everything is ok
    that's how i deal it with my parents but i haven't made it completely clear to them
    well i think they're in denial so it will be more hard
     
  11. csl20

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    came out about 4 months ago as bi and then a month later i realized i was just lesbian my may parents are cool with it but I am not allowed to see my cousins anymore because i am gay
     
  12. Love4Ever

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    Last month.
     
  13. Chierro

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    Started to come out to friends when I was 12 or 13. I didn't come out to family until this past March, though.
     
  14. Meadowlark17

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    About this time of year In 2012 gay
     
  15. Ruby Dragon

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    I first came out (as lesbian) on 6 June 2012, but later came out a second time as bisexual (Not sure of the exact date/year). My parents were a lot more accepting of the bisexual label, as they realized I could still end up with a man... I'm currently out to anyone who cares about me
     
  16. Chris2018

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    Came out to my husband as genderfluid possibly a gay transguy in January. Still very much closeted with everyone else.
     
  17. Danielito

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    To this day i've never really come out to anyone in real life, namely cuz i'm still very much uncertain as to what my sexuality, i don't want to come out unless i'm very certain as to whether i'm bi or str8 or mostly str8 or mostly gay, but since i'm still not sure then thats why i'm still pretty much closeted and alone so to speak.
     
  18. Rade

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    Told my wife im bisexual February 2018 aged 42.....now separated. Though since then I have told some people I'm gay, can't make my mind up, suppose I'm still coming out as I am now not afraid to let my feelings go wherever they want, and it guys, guys guys.....
     
  19. AdityaD

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    Last night, I came out as gay to a very good friend of mine. I was a little bit nervous but she took it exceptionally well. I'm not planning to come out to anyone else right now as I think, that I'm not ready for anyone else to know about it.
     
  20. Rade

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    And that's fine there is no pressure, should be when you feel comfortable with it. ....
    I have not told everyone as it's very personal. I would have preferred to have waited till I met a guy and just say this is my boyfriend. I'm not keen on labels, I've used bi, gay but now I just say I'm not straight and people can think what they want.