What are you thinking?

3 days of no sleep - not recommended.

 

Maybe exaggerating a bit but I just can't properly fall asleep. Any sleep I have had has been very poor quality.

It gets light way too early now (not even 5am and already light here) and birds are singing from 3.30am.

 

Love those rainbows and raccoons

 

Current mental stability: My friends reassuring me it is not my fault being unemployed during a pandemic

 

We're not in the same boat. We're in different boats, weathering the same storm, which is stronger in some areas than others.

 

wikihow memes

 

I'm tired and picrew isn't working but I need a picrew for my pfp and none of my old ones look like me now o deer

 

I've wasted this quarantine. I could've spent it learning how to cook and practicing parallel parking so I can get my license. Instead I've spent it still working, playing video games, and cleaning.

 

The ceiling of my first floor apartment in a four story building collapsed. Like, the building fell down, type of collapsed. There was a severe flood in the apartment they were renovating upstairs which caused tons of water to crash down through their floor/my ceiling once it annihilated the structural supports. I was home when it happened. I can now definitely add "the entire upstairs apartment literally falling through the floor on top of my head with a tidal wave of water" to my list of things to have nightmares about....during a pandemic, of course, because what better time for my house to try to kill me. Moving everything I own out of the building through the soaked wreckage, broken furniture, and destroyed live electrical wires while hoping the other two floors didn't crash down on top of me too at any moment also wasn't exactly fun either. Moved into a new apartment now and everything is mostly fine again, but holy shit that was traumatic. I'm just glad our dog didn't die and my fiance wasn't home to be in danger.

 

Thinking about how excited I am about a few things, despite all the uncertainty going on: my second book coming out in a little over a week, a video interview I did regarding the anthology I wrote for which is coming out later this year (the interview was the scary part, since I'm super camera shy--but it turned out pretty good, and so far as I know, I didn't make a fool of myself).

Now if only I could focus on this 3-year-old WIP that's been begging me to finish it.

I will finish it. I WILL finish it. (Well, at least this draft).

 

I'm thinking about isolation. Today's one of those days where I've been feeling more isolated than usual.

 

Falling in the street and grazing both knees is no fun. Happened 10 hours ago and still no less painful.

 

I think I put way too much honey in my tea. Sweetness overload! D:

 

Spoiler: George Floyd

In a sick and twisted kind of way - I really hope that these protests have the desire impact or at least get the ball rolling. I'm not a violent person or endorse it, but have a "what else can they do?" attitude. Nothing has happened after all the school shootings, the Pulse shooting and no significant change after the women's/anti-trump/climate marches sooooo. I just can't see trump doing anything at all

 

Spoiler: George Floyd

The protests just arrived in my city, and I accidentally drove directly through them earlier. Took all of 2 minutes for me to lose all support for them. The protests aren't being run by actual concerned protesters, it's anarchists and organized crime fanning the flames to manipulate people and commit large scale crime under the cover of protesting. I live in the capital of my state, and literally watched armed gang members wearing gang colors firing off explosives/fireworks over my car aimed directly at our capitol building's windows, senate building, and threatening to murder the police unlucky enough to be guarding them. A few miles down the road, people wearing the same gang colors were looting stores, it's literally just a distraction to commit crimes and make chaos unopposed.

I also don't know why people expect Trump to do anything. It's not a federal problem. The federal agents are the least corrupt law enforcement organizations in the country. The problem is the local cops under city jurisdiction which nobody can do anything about except local mayors. Not to mention that Minnesota is a 100% democratic run state at every level of government. There's not one Republican in any significant part of Minneapolis government yet somehow the Republican president gets blamed for George Floyd.

 

I've recently discovered French rap music, and it's pretty great. I don't understand a word of it but I'm jamming out. Sounds so fancy but so aggressive at the same time.

 

Interesting. I will have to check it out. I’ve recently started listening to alien music and I recommend.