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What am i?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by santu2000, Sep 16, 2018 at 1:28 AM.

  1. santu2000

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    helsinki
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    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
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    Out to everyone
    Hi im 18 years old but doesn't know what i'm realy am.
    I'm born as a boy, but i'm not feel like a boy, but doesn't feel a girl also.
    I'm happy with my boyish body but i'm not happy to act as a boy.
    I dress fulltime as female using make up female clothing and juwelery let my hair grow out.
    I'm actractive to girls men doesn't have my interest.
    What am i???

    Greetz from finland
     
  2. Bardic

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Western Australia
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I'm afraid that you're the only person who can figure out what you are, but I'll try and talk through some of the things that you could be.

    You say you're okay with your boy-ish body, so that could mean you're not trans, or that you are trans without gender dysphoria. (Helpful, I know).
    You do seem to like to dress feminine, but that doesn't mean you have to be a woman. Dress isn't the same as gender. They can go together, though, so it can be one of many reasons to think you're trans.

    It's possible that you're not comfortable in your body but you've learned to feel distant from it so you don't notice. Do you feel more like yourself when you look more like a girl, aside from dress? Like, once I saw a shadow on my face that made it look like I had a beard and I realised I wanted to look like that all the time.

    One of the things that made me realise I was trans was realising that I always pictured myself as a boy in my head, even when I was a little kid.
    Another was realising I wanted my body to be like other boys' bodies (like, they had Adam's apples--I wanted one, too).

    Being attracted to women and not men doesn't mean anything for your gender, so no need to worry about it unless you really wanted to for some reason.

    Also, not to be rude but you seem to struggle with English and since you're Finnish I assumed it was your second language. If anything I wrote is hard for you to read then let me know and I will say it again in different words.

    Salutations from Australia.
     
  3. santu2000

    Regular Member

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    oke my female side is stronger than my boy side but i dont want change my gender because im proud of my birth gender.
    but i live my life fulltime in the female role some times i say that im a fulltime crossdresser but thats so strange to say by my self i will call me bigender but is it bigender?
     
  4. Bardic

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
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    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    You could be bigender. You could also be a non-transitioning transwoman.
    Maybe you could be something new you have to define for yourself.

    Maybe worry less about finding a label and focus on doing what you want and feel comfortable with. If you do that, then the label might come easier, and if not, then at least you're not trying to cram yourself in a box. Just a suggestion, though.