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Wanting to learn more about different genders!

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by ken867, Oct 15, 2018.

  1. ken867

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    I'm going through my own gender thing at the moment a dI would like to hear from people who identify in numerous ways how they feel about their gender, how they identify, what that means and is like for them, how they experience gender, etc. Now I know that this is all very personal and please don't feel like you have to reply. I would say that I know a fair amount about different genders but that doesn't mean that I'm an expert. if you identify as female, male, androgynous, genderqueer, graygender, demigender, etc I really want to hear about your experiences and what gender means to you.
     
  2. Cha0ticG

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    So I identify as gender fluid. I went through a whole lot of questioning and weirdness to get to this point, and still am continuing to question myself. Gender has never really bothered me at all, well accept for the stereotypes and my family wishing and even yelling and screaming for me to act ‘normal’. Being biologically born female I would understand why they act like that, yet the approach they took really damaged a LOT of my self confidence. The way they spoke and excluded me out of things damaged our relationships and how I looked at myself. As of today, we’ll lately at least I feel much more connected to my male and non binary sides. I use different names to express myself and feel much more comfortable in my skin. Sometimes I want to cut my hair and wear the clothing I want. Other times I want to dress up in dresses and talk about anything I want. I don’t care what gender you are whether it be male, female, nonbinary, or whatever! You should be loved and accepted regardless of what you identify as. Anyways that’s my take on gender and such. I hope I helped a bit friend. See ya!
     
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  3. Cailan

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    I am afab, and identify as bi-gender, which is similar to genderfluid in that there are multiple gender identities, but limited to two genders, without any mixing or stops in between. It's the oldest officially recognized (by psychiatrists) non-binary gender, dating to about the 1960s, even before the better-known agender and androgyne were formally recognized (which were already more recognized in popular culture, mostly through fashion/expression). Bi-gender can be any two genders - guy/girl, guy/androgyne, girl/neutrois, demi-girl/agender, etc.

    In my case I have distinct and very binary guy and girl sides. They don't mix, like androgyne, and I alternate between one and the other, usually for 2-5 months at a time, in what I call a girl swing or a guy swing (like a pendulum going back and forth). When I'm on a girl swing, I'm pretty much all girl, and when I'm on a guy swing I'm all guy, internally. My therapist said in her experience it's somewhat like multiple personality disorder, but two flavors of the same personality, rather than two different personalities.

    My guy side doesn't mind presenting femme but I feel great when I present masc, and my girl side doesn't mind my HRT and surgical transition to male appearance (I had top surgery 3 months ago), as long as I present totally femme when on a girl swing. When one is active, the other is usually almost entirely dormant, with remnant bits here and there. There are also situational switches within a gender swing, or example, at dance class I rarely feel like a guy at all and can't imagine being or presenting male, and sexually I'm almost always a guy.

    When I'm a girl, I remember the feeling of being a guy and loving being a guy, but I can't for the life of me imagine why I'd want to be a guy. There's a total disconnect. But the memory is there. And the reverse as a guy - I can't imagine not wanting to be a guy, and while I remember my joy in being a girl, the thought of being a girl is alien.

    There is a transitional time between swings, when both are present to some degree, still distinct and it's dysphoric as hell because I can't figure out who I am. For a few weeks I'm stuck with both, and miserable.

    I do have internal conflicts. My girl side desperately loves long hair, my guy side much prefers the short hair. I keep trying to grow it out when I go into a girl swing, then when I go into a guy swing I cut it all off again because I get dysphoric. Same with body hair (shave/grow) and especially the choice of bottom surgery I want. When I'm a guy, I want it all, full surgical transition, but as a girl I can't imagine giving up my internal parts. Which I end up with depends on which I am when I go into surgery.
     
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  4. Hugh

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    I'm genetically male, I look like a guy and could not fool anyone that I'm not. And, overall, it does not make me unhappy. I enjoy being a guy most of the time, accepting that I'm gay. Asked about my gender though, I feel I am about 75% female. I don't have a problem with that, either. I often think like a girl and the voice in my head, often is female. But I have no wish to transition So what am I?
     
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  5. ken867

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    I find what you have to say interesting. May I ask, are you currently struggling with your gender identity or are you comfortable with it?
     
  6. Hugh

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    I'm old enough to go with the flow, so I'm comfortable but these are changing times. Who knows what I may feel in the future. Nothing is fixed. It's one reason why transitioning would never occur to me, apart from being over six feet tall with size 11 feet - I'd look ridiculous as a woman! So only in my head. I've been on here over ten years but had a bit if a long break. I will do a reintroduction.
     
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