Hi all, I'm 27 and realised I'm not straight about a year ago, I'm pretty sure I'm bi, I didn't tell anyone until a few days ago when I finally told my best friend, she was great and supportive and now I feel encouraged to explore this. I have been dating and sleeping with guys for 10 years now so I know what I'm doing in every sense (dating etiquette and sexually) but I've never done anything more than kiss a girl. I'm really scared that I'm not going to know what to do and I'm going to be terrible. More than that, where am I going to meet someone who wants to sleep with or date me, its like going back to being a teenager again. I'm scared all girls around my age will think I'm an 'annoying straight girl who wants to use them to experiment'. I need advice, I'm on dating sites and I'm messaging a girl a kissed in a club once. Should I be honest and how and what should I say and do to move forward? I need help
Hey I know it all seems really scary but think of it as a new adventure. I would be honest with them and tell them you have never been with a girl before, honesty is always the best policy, I don't think I'd phrase it as a straightforward girl wanting to experiment but more someone who has only recently discovered the wonderful world of women, don't worry you don't have to use those exact words. If she isn't interested because of that then she isn't worth it.
I feel your pain girl. I feel like I'm a pro (not literally) with men and a novice with women. But, when the time comes for you, be honest with her and just trust that it is natural. Best of luck to you. You will be fine.
The first time, I was so nervous, but she was so warm and open to me. There is no right way to have lesbian sex, it all just flows naturally, its very individual and very much about feels right to you and her. I would say just be honest. More people are open and understanding about someone coming out late than you would expect. When you click with someone talk about being a bit nervous, tell them to guide you on what they like, and then the fun part - explore eachother's likes and dislikes.
I'm in the same place! It's scary and exciting and intimidating and oh so desirable! I'm talking to someone, we really seem to have clicked, and we're meeting on Sunday. And I'm getting ahead of myself thinking about what it might be like to be with her. When I do get to that point with someone, it will be with full disclosure of my inexperience. I have this idea, though, that it will be fairly natural - that it will just be right. Which is odd, because while I identify as bi, I've never had that thought about men. The idea of sex with a man is still awkward to me.
Same fears over here girl!! I almost wanna pretend it isn't my first time just to avoid that awkwardness. But then I'm gonna be a mess LOL
Wow, we're the same exact age. Except that I'm a complete/total virgin- zero experience with women or men. I don't think It's that big of a deal. A lot of lesbians are scared of being used as an experiment, but they usually don't mind inexperience as long as the risk of that isn't there.
Thank you so much all of you who have replied, I have never felt this feeling of other people understanding how i feel or having any similar experiences to me. I have no queer or openly (to me anyway) questioning friends and to finally hear that I'm not alone feels so amazing that I can't explain it. Really, thank you so much for your messages of support, they mean more than you could know!
Thank you for Good luck for Sunday, you will be fine. I totally understand, right now its just imagining to me and I think you're right that you should be excited as well as nervous. I am going to try to follow your example and be brave!
last year when i was in my late 20s was my first ever girl experience. i had no bloody clue what to do or if i eveen wanted to do more than just kiss. but i can tell you know lesbian sex is amazing and somehow you just know what to do. and ask as some girls will like you to be inside them and some will like just outter stimulation. either way is so much better than sex with a guy. goodluck!
