1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Very painful realization

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by CL1990, Jan 10, 2022.

  1. CL1990

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2015
    Messages:
    306
    Likes Received:
    52
    Location:
    California
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    Other
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    A few people
    im a gay woman in her early 30s with very little to no experience in dating in general (and woman specifically). Ive always blamed it on being unlucky, on being too picky, of not finding gay woman that are my type but ive recently come across across a very unconfortable realization:

    I am absolutely terrified of woman and getting close to one.

    All these feelings have come up after ive met someone i fancy and even though i dont know if she is available to be the prospect of even having a friendship is terrifying. I second guess everything i say and im close to a panic when im about to speak/see her. These feelings thankfully subside when i actually speak to her and i feel very happy when she is nice to me…

    Ive always felt a big sense of shame of having so little experience at my age but now i “see” this side of myself i cant see how i could have experienced with such terrified feelings. any advice? its an intense rollercoaster of emotions
     
  2. CL1990

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2015
    Messages:
    306
    Likes Received:
    52
    Location:
    California
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    Other
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    A few people
    any advice on this would be greatly appreciated, not sure if anyone else has experienced the same level of fear?
     
  3. Dragon Master

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2022
    Messages:
    32
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    United States
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight but curious
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    Hey! I have a similar experience when trying to make new friends. My siggestion to you would be to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. What I mean is start paying attention to the weird feelings ypu gey and focus on them. Once you focus on your discomfort, it'll start to ease away. I hope this help and have a good day!
     
    CL1990 likes this.
  4. CL1990

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2015
    Messages:
    306
    Likes Received:
    52
    Location:
    California
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    Other
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    A few people
    thank you for your words! that sounds like a sensible plan and slowly hopefully it will get better!