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Types of Bisexuality

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by LilLady9, Mar 23, 2021.

  1. LilLady9

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    What are the different types of bisexuality?
     
  2. LilLady9

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    Some I have found: Heterosexual-leaning bisexual, Homosexual-leaning bisexual, Heteroromantic bisexual, Heteroflexible bisexual, Varied type bisexual, 50/50 bisexual.

    Are these all of them?
     
  3. out2019

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    From what I understand, most people fall on a spectrum. I might have some interest in women but nothing compared to men, so I consider myself gay. I have also noticed the more I have accepted myself I literally don't fantasize about women at all.
     
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  4. Nickw

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    Joe Kort wrote an article in Psychology Today about this subject (2014). Google it. It offers some insight into men who have sex with men.

    Be careful of the term “Heteroromantic”. This may be an easy out answer for those of us who cannot accept our sexuality.
     
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  5. LilLady9

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    Thanks, I'm going to check it out.

    Definitely. I was just using it as an example for different types of bisexualities and don't really relate to it.

    I'm very accepting of my bisexuality and I'm actually quite proud of it. :slight_smile: I honestly think it's super cool.
     
    #5 LilLady9, Mar 24, 2021
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2021
  6. LilLady9

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    @Nickw Do you accept the idea that there are different types of bisexualities? If you do, how many are there? What are they called?
     
    #6 LilLady9, Mar 24, 2021
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2021
  7. Nickw

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    @BiBoyToy

    I believe there are an infinite number of ways to be a bisexual. What purpose is served in categorizing them?
     
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  8. LilLady9

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    For me, it's not so much about categorizing them but more about me having a full understanding of myself and having a term to go with it. To be able to give someone a term that describes my sexuality rather than spending several minutes explaining it to them. If that makes sense.
     
  9. Nickw

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    @BiBoyToy

    Ask 100 bisexuals what being bi is and you get 100 answers!

    You mentioned you thought being bisexual was cool. I agree. Sexual attraction is a beautiful thing! Being able to feel that for others, regardless of their sex, IS cool.

    I cannot understand my boyfriend who cannot feel the sensual beauty of a woman. Or, my totally straight male friends who see a hot guy and not feel desire. We’re all unique and we do not have to be able to explain ourselves.
     
    #9 Nickw, Mar 25, 2021
    Last edited: Mar 25, 2021
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  10. DecentOne

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    OK, to look at even more labels of bisexuals, even though it can bring more ways to be unclear or not applicable. At least “bisexual” is now a choice on certain forms, such as my new doctor’s office, and I’m happy about checking it, though you are looking more deeply into what even that label can mean.

    There are some concepts of bisexuality which parse out how the bisexual person is drawn to more than one - at the same time, or one at a time, etc. From the Journal of Bisexuality:
    “using the chronological occurrence of homosexual and heterosexual contacts as a starting point, there is the suggestion repeatedly found in the literature to differentiate between serial or sequential bisexuality, concurrent, and simultaneous bisexuality. Alternating between male and female partners is described as serial or sequential bisexuality, during which longer monogamous or at least monosexual relationship phases may occur. Concurrent bisexuality, on the other hand, is used for the coexistence of same-sex and opposite-sex sexual contacts within a certain period of time. Finally, simultaneous bisexuality refers to those sexual situations in which at least one partner each of the same and the opposite sex, that is, at least three persons, are involved.”
    [Ulrich Gooß (2008) Concepts of Bisexuality, Journal of Bisexuality, 8:1-2, 9-23, DOI: 10.1080/15299710802142127]​

    I experience the bi-cycle internally (though I’ve pretty much have switched to all-male fantasy for the past three years, not by any conscious control), but have been in this monogamous / monosexual relationship with my wife for more than 30 years. Never had a boyfriend or sexual experience with a guy. So kind of hard to parse out (under that section of the scholar’s paper) which kind of bisexual I am by behavior/experience.

    Labels can be very limiting. As a teen the people around me said were only two categories: Gay or Straight. On the playground you were labeled Gay if you ever had sex with a guy, even once (and if you’d done it since 1977 you couldn’t give blood - it was a forever thing!). I had never even kissed a guy (though I had felt the romantic pull to a couple, and friends noticed me staring at guys as a teen), and I got aroused around girls. So under playground rules about labels I was straight. The label worked for me for the next four decades, but was inaccurate. After therapy I switched from considering myself straight, to bisexual.

    So yeah, be careful at defining labels, as @Nickw points out we’d all define ourselves differently if given the freedom to do so.
     
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  11. Patrick7269

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    I’ll add some of my own experience, although I am primarily gay and certainly no expert on bisexuality! I don’t know if this can be extrapolated to the converse case (a straight man who may be slightly bi); this is only what I feel.

    My Experience, Your Mileage Will Vary

    Since I was little I have had crushes on males, wanted to share my life with males, and had amazing sex with males. For me, it has been easy to identify as gay because from an early age the impulse was there emotionally, spiritually and sexually.

    It’s hard to describe my feelings for men because men are:
    • beautiful
    • handsome
    • playful
    • alluring
    • fascinating
    • inscrutable
    • exotic
    • mysterious
    • mischievous
    • strong
    • protective
    • bold
    • cute
    • sexy
    • hot
    • et cetera...
    • et cetera...
    • et cetera...
    Can you tell I’m a bit boy-crazy? *lol*

    I have had crushes on guys at the most inconvenient times, in the least convenient ways, and with some men that would seem unlikely. I don’t seek out male beauty, it seeks me - whether I want it to or not. I have had plenty of gay sex. The whole topic of men is easy to dive into and possibly could engulf me for the rest of my life. The tidal wave of male fascination is undeniable for me and for this reason I consider it obvious, innate and natural.

    However, I have also had close platonic relationships with females, and there have been females in my life that I consider to be unquestionably beautiful. Sometimes I see a female that I cannot help but admire for her physical beauty, personality, or way of being. While I see these beautiful qualities about women, I do not feel a longing to be close with women emotionally, spiritually, or sexually.

    My interest in women is platonic, aesthetic, and easily understood. I see women who are beautiful, note their beauty, and move on with my day. My female friends and I have drinks, a laugh, and we go home to our respective lives. I care about them deeply, but I do not get washed away with a tidal wave of fascination. I also consider this to be innate and natural for me.

    I watch heterosexual porn and have fantasies about heterosexual sex, in addition to gay porn and gay sex. When watching straight porn I am focused on the male. When fantasizing about heterosexual sex it focused on the male, or if I were to participate it would be a threesome with a male and female where I am interested in the male.

    So am I bisexual? Not really, unless in the most technical way.

    What do I draw from my experience? My sexuality is:
    • Primarily focused on men
    • Innate from a young age
    • Can be complex, mysterious, and overwhelming
    • Can be inconvenient or counter to what is socially acceptable
    • Sometimes indulged by porn, sometimes by fantasy, although these may not be consistent and may seem to contradict a solely “gay” identity
    So for anyone sorting out their sexual orientation this is my experience of sexuality. I consider myself gay but with some curiosity that could be considered bi-curiosity, however this doesn’t change my innate interest in men.

    Thanks,

    Patrick
     
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  12. LilLady9

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    It sure is! :slight_smile:
     
    #12 LilLady9, Mar 26, 2021
    Last edited: Mar 26, 2021
  13. LilLady9

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    Well explained, @DecentOne. Thank you for your input.
     
  14. LilLady9

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    I think I'm a slightly hetero-leaning bisexual.
     
  15. LilLady9

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    Something like that. XD
     
  16. Digdogger

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    No idea if this is a thing (because I just Made it up) but I think I'm bisexual leaning towards lesbianism...
    I consider myself bi but have often had doubts wheter I'm really a lesbian.
    This because my physical attraction towards woman is much greater than towards men.
    When I see a woman walking in the street with some Nice curves, that really does something to me on a physical level, I don't have this with men at all.
    I'm just naturally very attracted to the female body sexually, I can't even really help it, it's purely a physical reaction over which I have no conscious control.

    On the other hand my sexual fantasies involve both men and woman (mostly not at the same time :wink: ).
    Also, I like men better on an emotional level, I generally don't enjoy spending time with woman because I can't really relate to most of them.
     
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  17. BiGemini87

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    Wait, do the micro labels not count, too? :sweat_smile: I came here thinking someone would have mentioned them, but I suppose for some, despite bisexuality oftentimes being an umbrella term for said micro labels, not all people consider their label to be concurrent with bisexuality?

    Which I find confusing, because to me, bisexual, pansexual, polysexual, omnisexual etc. are all different sides of the same die.
     
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  18. LilLady9

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    From my understanding, that is referred to as homosexual-leaning bisexuality, which is a pretty well recognized bisexual orientation. :slight_smile:

    Same here. I'm definitely bisexual though.

    Well said. I totally relate to this!

    Same. :slight_smile:
     
  19. LilLady9

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    Right!?!
     
  20. FerAmaral

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    Very accurate...
     
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