I really wasn't going to post, but I feel like I have to post or at least need to talk about it. For a little backround info I am seeing a psychiatrist and psychologist regurarly and been on medication for at least 2 years. I have high functioning anxiety, depression and have had suicidal thoughts in the past, what medication has really been helping to keep under control. I also have adhd and several health issues. Hospital was my other home when I was little, because I also have genetic defects. I've learned to live with difficulties. For like past month though I have been feeling suicidal again. I just feel like I can burst into tears over nothing, been thinking about wanting to kill myself and I've been crying, but I've been good taking my medication despite my bad memory. Suicidal thoughts was what made me to search for help in the first place. I've never made any plans, only imagined. I just feel tired and I hate myself for it and these thoughts. I feel a little better now, that I've written it down, but the bad feelings are still there. Maybe I need to ask my psychiatrist to rise the dosage of my medication. I hate being so negative.