So a friend has reached out to me about how her transition is going and how he is feeling depressed. I want to help her, but I may able to relate on the LGBT side, but when it comes to depression and gender identity I don't relate very well. I want to try to be mindful and help her. Here is how the conversation is started and is going. Her: "That's good to hear. Sorry for responding so late. I saw your reply yesterday, but I haven't been doing well and couldn't figure out a way to say that without it sounding bad." Me: "Oh no! Well if you need someone to talk to. I'm always willing to listen." Her: "I've been depressed for a while, mostly because of my transgender issues. I've started dealing with it recently, but it looks like I won't be able to afford anything more than the hormones. It's like trying to get better has made me feel worse and more trapped than ever." My friend was a boy and is now transitioning to a girl. Should I start using female pronouns in my messages if needed or do I wait for her to tell me to use them? Also, do I ask her what she wants to be called now name-wise because her Facebook name is still Justin? Also, if you could give me advice on my response I would appreciate it. Here is what I have so far: "Well being able to admit who you are and work your way towards it is something you should feel happy about it. Of course, it's okay to feel sad or depressed or even feel like you don't know what to do. There is no easy answer to make any of those feelings go away, but it's important to be proud of how far you come and use that feeling to further yourself. I'm here for you!" Is that cliche? Should I change or add anything else help make her feel better. Again, I am not able to relate very well to depression and gender identity so I'm trying to be mindful of what to say. Also, do you think I should refer her to this site? I know when I came out as gay like four years ago it was very beneficial to me. Any help would be appreciated! Thanks!
Ummm all i can say is wait for her to tell you how she wants to be called and her pronouns which seem to be leaning more towards the female side. You could google some of what the side effects are of estrogen and find out what they will help her with so that you know more of what to expect. Dont push her to tell you everything right away but try to help her when she asks and a lot of them need help with learning about makeup techniques so maybe you can help with that so she can feel better about herself. Other than that i dont know cos im falling asleep. Ill reply more later. Hope this helps. Feel free to write on my wall or pm me
Tell her to join us on here! Lol i love this place i've gotten so much help and advice from everyone here. For real tho you sound like a good friend. You can ask her. Ask her if cause she's transitioning to a girl does she want to use she/her pronouns and/or a different name. Maybe she hasn't picked one out and would want help. Has she done anything physically yet? Like has she gone shopping for women's clothes or grown out/cut her hair at all? I say this b/c w/ me i want my dad and people at work to know but i'm simultaneously terrified of rejection so i have yet to tell anyone.
