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Top and bottom versus self-confidence

Discussion in 'Physical & Sexual Health' started by HunGuy, Feb 18, 2015.

  1. HunGuy

    HunGuy Guest

    Hey guys!

    My question is for versatile men here: how does your confidence affect your position in bed?
    I'm still a virgin, but I noticed that when I'm more confident, I fantasize about topping a guy. But when I'm depressed or insecure, I fantasize about being topped by a guy.

    I guess it comes from the need to be 'taken care of' when I'm not so confident. Has anybody else experienced this? Virgins can answer too.
     
  2. Quem

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    Around my boyfriend, I'm actually always confident, so I don't think that will play a role for me. =) I think that for me and my boyfriend (who is versatile too), it will depend on how tired we are. If I'm a bit tired, it will be more likely for me to be the bottom (assuming that my boyfriend is not tired). We both are quite sure that we will decide our positions each time at the moment, but I doubt that confidence will play a role in that matter. :icon_bigg
     
  3. Wildside

    Wildside Guest

    It's funny how a lot of guys see bottoming as somehow being inferior. For me, it is just what I most enjoy. It's such a good feeling, in a whole lot of ways. I can top, and I do it if a partner asks me to, as long as I am also getting what I need (bottoming), but I never see it as a result of not having self confidence. But that's just me. If someone else sees it different, that's fine too. In which case, I can only pray that there are a lot of "confident" guys out there!!!
     
  4. SkyColours38

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    Even if it's based on the stereotype that topping=dominance and bottoming=submissiveness, it's your fantasy and if it's what you like, then that's cool (and also definitely normal).
     
  5. CyberScream

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    Sometimes people fail to see the aggressive bottom and the indecisive top. I'm sick of being the unsure and indecisive top... and be a bit more aggressive... but I want to be the aggressive bottom as well. Even then, I can still be in control of the situation as I see fit. But without a partner... all I can do is practice...
     
  6. Wildside

    Wildside Guest

    that! power bottoms! :thumbsup:
     
  7. OnTheHighway

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    My partner prefers to top more than bottom, although he is a bit of what I would consider to be a passive versatile top. I really enjoy bottoming (tend to be more of a power bottom) While also enjoy being a top on occasion. For me, my mood does not determine whether I am interested in being a top or a bottom; rather, I follow the mood of my partner. If he is in the mood to top, I am happy to bottom. If he wants to be the bottom, I am happy being the top. In all cases, whatever the role is, I am typically the more dominant one and he is typically the more passive one. That might not seem like the logical approach to things, but for us, it seems to be what works.