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Tips on starting a conversation?

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by SamanthaSmiles, Mar 3, 2013.

  1. SamanthaSmiles

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    I like this girl a lot, but she's straight so nothing will happen. I would be happy being friends with her though. Does anyone have any advice on how to start a friendship? I text her occasionally, but I want something more than that.
     
  2. Kgirl

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    I guess just ask her about her self, hobbies, pets etc etc. And ask more questions relating to her answers, to show that you're interested. This is obvious stuff, sorry, but that's really all there is to it. Show an interest and hopefully you'll find that you have similar interests or personalities for a friendship to form.

    Don't force it though if clearly you're incompatible, whether for friendship or more.
     
  3. SamanthaSmiles

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    When we rode the same bus, we used to talk a lot, so I know that we have things in common. The main problem is that when I see her, my head gets all mixed up and goes into the typical teenage flurry of "She's so beautiful, oh my gosh she's looking at me, wow that color looks great on her, her laugh is so amazing." I hate it because it's so typically adolescent.
     
  4. Kgirl

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    I guess if a friendship is what you're looking for, you'll have to get over your crush somehow. Or at least put it aside and be able to focus on your conversation. Maybe you need a little break from her before trying to form a friendship.
     
  5. Lexington

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    You start conversations with attractive people the same way you start them with ugly people. :slight_smile:

    1. Find your common ground.
    2. Talk, or better yet, ask questions about your common ground.

    Are there TV shows you both watch? Do you shop at any of the same stores? Do you like the same type of music? Anything like this can be the launching point for a conversation.

    "I do really like that color on you. Can I ask where you got that outfit?"
    "I got it at (store)."
    "I've never been there. Do they usually have good stuff there?"

    Lex
     
  6. Gipsy

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    I would be careful, it's better to just remain distant friends, especially if you've never been close friends with her before. I'd be careful because maybe there would be some points were you can't resist tempting to be with her because of the fact that you like her but you know nothing would happen because she's straight. Stuff like that happens unfortunately, but if you think that wouldn't get in between if you were to bring a closer bond with her then...

    Why not start a friendship like you started with anyone else that has been your friend? Go with the flow, start off with casual things like what's she's done today, how she feels, etc.

    It's not such a hard task, unlike trying to suspect if they like you back, that'd be more challenging. :lol:
     
  7. SamanthaSmiles

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    Thanks for the tips :slight_smile: I'll try talking to her tomorrow and let you know how it goes.
     
  8. TwoMethod

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    Just to bump in here—

    I think it is important that you truly recognise that there is no possibility of a relationship here. I was totally crushing on an amazing guy, but he was straight, so I convinced myself that I could just be friends with him. But I couldn't cope being friends with someone who I wanted to be with more than anything.

    I know consciously you have recognised that you won't be able to have a relationship with here, but just make sure that's really how you feel deep down and that you're not hoping somewhere in there that somehow something may come out of it in the relationship department.

    With regards to making new friends: sorry, I'm flippin' awful at making new friends, but I think the advice above is good.
     
  9. SamanthaSmiles

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    I know that there will always be a tiny bit of hope deep, deep down, but I just have to ignore it. She hooked up with a female friend of mine, but I'm not sure what the circumstances were, but they both say that they're straight. As long as I don't let any physical contact-even platonic contact-happen, I'll be okay.