Hey! I just thought that maybe people who are struggling with coming out could have some tips and general advice about coming out. I have a psychology degree, worked with the LGBT community, and have a crisis intervention credential. (1) Take your time. There is absolutely no race in coming out. You come out whenever you feel ready. If your safety is in jeopardy, there's no reason why you ever have to to come out. (2) Mindfulness is so important. I'd suggest meditating and writing down the thought process of your sexual identity. In general, people tend to want to escape or avoid painful feelings, and although it is completely normal, you will get the best clarity by confronting your feelings and thoughts. I challenge you to accept the feelings and thoughts as a way that your mind is trying to protect you, but not necessarily always buying what you're saying to yourself. In simpler words, you are more than any label you give yourself and you are a separate entity from your thoughts. You are solely a vessel who listens to your thoughts, and you have the power to decide to go towards or away your own values (apart from what you say/think to yourself). (3) Labeling - we get so caught up in figuring out if we are gay, straight, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, etc. The fact is sexuality is fluid. Dr. Kinsey made a test to show a spectrum but we're all more nuanced than that. Some people identify with one label and then decide to have another later and then may switch again and that's okay. You might feel more straight one day and more gay another or you may always feel like you're a lesbian. The point is sexuality and gender are fluid, so it might be more beneficial to figure out what individual person it is that you are attracted to more than how you identify. Labels make a person more rigid and since this is all about a fluid topic, it may be best to be flexible with the idea of what label makes your identity. Again, you are more than any a definition of a label. (4) Find a community. Welcome to EC! This is a great online community for you. When you are ready, your local LGBT community would open their arms up to support you. It's so nice to be around people just like you! (5) Be prepared before coming out. In any transition, there's the love stages of grief/death that occurs. They are denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, and acceptance. Although some go straight to acceptance, some people might have some another stage to go through before getting there. I wish for you all the love and support. We're all here for you to answer any questions. The EC community is amazing and helped me when I needed support getting out the closet, too. <3
My absolute pleasure. I hope it helps! Also, it won't let me edit but it's suppose to be just "stages of grief" not "love stages". I hope everyone knows to omit that word when reading the second to last paragraph
