Dear Everyone That Want To Die, Today at school I had to witness my friend dying inside after her friend died. If you think no one cares a single bit for you, you're wrong. Even though I don't know you personally, I know there are some people who want to die, but I'm saying don't die. I kept on getting up when life pushed me down and now I'm here, telling the World about my horrible life. You may think 'No one has a worse life than I do.' you may be right but people love you and life will get better as time passes. I don't mean to sound so cliche but it's all true. Please, talk to people if you need help.
Good for you! Are you doing better? I've been praying for you so I hope the prayers have been working.
People don't realize how much others care about them sometimes - I always hate seeing people feel alone and like they want to die. Suicide is never a good option, no matter how bad things are. If anyone here ever feels like they don't have anyone who cares about them, post on my profile and I'll talk to you. I care about you even if we have never talked before - because every person has good in them and deserves to know they are worth caring about.
Also, there is no such thing as "NORMAL", we are each unique in our own way. Only took 40 years for me to figure that out!
We may need to talk sometime. I've tried to kill myself multiple times but I never did. I always chickened out and I'm so glad I chickened out becuase otherwise I wouldn't be still smiling!
You shouldn't though, what's bothering you that makes you feel that way? It might help to talk about it and work through it.
Just fucking life. My mom's so damn pissed that my grade is a C- in Science. AGH! Having a non-biological mom and living your life in a dark room crying- MY FUCKING MOM TALKS TO ME THEN I CAN'T THINK AND THEN I GET MORE PISSED!
I have three adopted siblings so I totally understand its difficult having a non-biological mom sometimes, I watched them go through that as kids and it was hard for them sometimes. Have you told your mom her talking to you about things just makes you more distracted and upset? Science isn't something everyone is good at, I'm a science (biochemistry) major in college and I've seen tons of people try really hard and still not be able to grasp the material. As long as you're trying your best, there's nothing wrong with getting a C - because not everyone can be good at everything in school. Do you think there's a way you could learn the material better though, or would spending more time studying help you prepare for the tests? It sounds like your mom just wants you to do well because she sees potential in you. If you really are trying your best already you should explain that to her though, you can't do any more than your best - so if your best is a C then she should be willing to understand that.
Off subject but my first ex boyfriend just told me we can't be friends anymore bc he hated some things he knew about me. I'm just broken and destroyed to the bone. On to the subject: I do know how to and i'm trying so hard. I'm adopted from Russia and know nothing at all about mmy real parents, i have no father and I have no siblings. life's fun.
I can't be as great as those people who get money for what they love. I tried to do what I love, nothing. I tried to love myself, nothing. Nothing is going right in my life.
Sorry to hear your ex-boyfriend said that - he might just be upset from the breakup, but he probably wouldn't have been a very good friend anyway if he hated things about you the whole time without telling you. You shouldn't let it destroy you, you'll be able to get a better boyfriend one day and you won't even miss the first one anymore. That's really unfortunate that you don't know anything about your birth parents, but you just said something my siblings have said before when they were feeling bad too. You said 'real parents' like your mother isn't your real parent. Parenting isn't determined by genetics - its who raises you and takes care of you, so your mom is much more of a 'real parent' than your birth parents actually, and you're definitely her real son and always will be. What do you love to do? If it's something that's hard to get a job doing, that doesn't mean you have to stop doing it, you can still do it as a hobby with whatever other job you end up choosing. I know loving yourself is hard, but it usually takes a while for people to feel that way and is actually pretty normal to struggle with that in teenage years. Your life will get better, don't lose hope.
eveyone says that about parenting but it just hits me hard when everyone in movies has a perfect family. I like singing, acting and dancing. I do those but everyone says everything I do is bad so a big hobby of mine is watching you tube videos.
Movies aren't real life though, and no one has a perfect movie family. My family looks perfect from the the outside, and many people have told me they're jealous of it, but what they don't see are the hidden problems. For example my dad is a great guy and everyone loves him - what they don't realize is he was barely ever around because he's worked 12-16 hours a day for the last 40 years straight by choice because he likes it, and has no time left for family stuff like spending time with me. You said you don't have a father, but what do you think would hurt more - not having one, or knowing he's there but doesn't want to spend time with you and would rather work instead. That's been my life, and it's definitely not a good feeling. No ones family is perfect, but it's important to appreciate the good things you do have in your family. There are tons of singing/acting/dancing groups that just do it for fun and it doesn't matter how good or bad you are at it. They do it just because they enjoy it, you can join one of those groups no matter what job you have later. Watching Youtube videos is cool, you can learn about so many topics on there. If you like videos, movies and theatrical related things, maybe you could become a filmmaker or crew member who works on movies as a career? Then you'd be around all the acting/singing/dancing stuff all the time and would be able to make your own videos.
