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The Transgender Education Thread

Discussion in 'Current Events, World News, & LGBT News' started by Hot Pink, Jul 12, 2011.

  1. Katelynn

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    I'm actually really hoping that is the case, but I'm pretty early on in researching everything, so I have no idea but I'm really hoping it does...
     
  2. XXReye

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    For hormones, I would look into the Sherbourne Clinic (also in Toronto). They don't handle GRS but their wait times for hormones are shorter than at CAMH (last I checked, anyway). I've also heard they're frienlier there.
    Have you looked at CAMH's website? They have info on there of what is required to be approved. You will probably have to get your counsellor to refer you to CAMH.

    I think there are also some websites out there with more info on what is involved in the actual surgery. (but I only know of ones for FTM, sorry >_<)

    I have HEARD that estrogen does not raise one's voice, but I have seen some places claiming it does.
     
  3. Katelynn

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    Thanks for this, I sort of had a feeling that estrogen didn't have any effect on the voice, but figured I'd ask anyway. As for CAMH, I'm still looking around. I will DEFINITELY look into the Sherbourne Clinic for hormones, but I live about 4 hours away from Toronto & I'm a college student, so money is a HUGE issue for me right now as far as travel goes. I also have to wait to speak with my counsellor as when I called to make my first appointment to speak with her, I got her VM saying she was out of office until Oct 3rd. She's also the only one I could find who's worked with LGBT folks before, so I'm deadset on her being my counsellor, as I don't want to take any more chances than I have to with the process...
     
  4. XXReye

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    Yeah, it sucks that CAMH is the only place people can go for it ): I heard that even some other provinces require people to go to CAMH in Toronto.
    Good luck with the counsellor! Too bad you have to wait so long, but hopefully she will work out for you.
     
  5. Katelynn

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    It does suck, but what can you do, that's the system. I'm hoping that between now & when I can get my first appointment, I can learn more about things. I feel kind of idiotic for asking, but should I take notes or something while I trying to find info for myself? And as for counselling, it took me a few days to work up the nerve to call about an appointment after I found her #, so I was really disappointed to hear she wasn't even in town until Oct 3rd. I didn't feel comfortable even leaving a message on the VM even tho it said it was confidential...
     
  6. Hitchhiker

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    I have an internet friend who recently came out as transgendered to me and I am totally cool with it but I had a few questions... well I was confused because he said he had recently discovered it (in the last 4-5 years) but I thought it was something you were BORN with y'know?
    Also my friend brought up something interesting. if I saw a picture of a transgendered person (let's say FtM for the sake of example) when they were a baby- would they be a she or a he in that picture?
    Thanks!
     
  7. Katelynn

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    Well, gender isn't physical it's more internal. I've felt like a girl my whole life, realized first that I am a girl when I was 10 (when I finally said to myself this is who I am) but I didn't really start accepting myself as female until the end of June. I have spent the last 25 years of my life hiding from myself, so I've done things like heavy drinking & trying to overcompensate with overly masculine behaviour to try & fit in. I never wore anything but black tshirts & jeans (which I still have to do, I'm going clothes shopping with a gf pretty soon finally!), never smiled, swore almost every other word & just tried to do whatever I could to fit inwith my guy friends, which honestly, were never that many to begin with. Like 97% of all my friends in my entire life have been female because I just feel more comfortable socializing with my own gender, even when I couldn't admit my true gender to myself. As for the picture, it would depend on how the baby was dressed, male or female. It's long been established that just because a person has male or female genitalia doesn't mean that they are that gender...
     
  8. Hot Pink

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    With the removal of the adams apple, does that alter your voice?
    It can, but results may vary and it's never drastic.

    Does estrogen raise your voice?
    No, it doesn't. Testosterone effects a FTM's voice because testosterone changes vocal cords, but estrogen doesn't.
     
  9. Katelynn

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    I suspected as much. Is there anything else in addition to vocal training that can assist with a more feminine voice? Or is this just a matter of luck & practice? I know I'll be able to pass after I've been on HRT for an extended period of time, but my voice is the big wild card for me at this point...
     
  10. Hot Pink

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    It really does come down to practice. Voice trainer or just self-teaching, it'll take a lot of work to feminize your voice.
     
  11. Katelynn

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    I had a feeling since I couldn't find anything concrete, just a bunch of products 'promising' to be able to do the job. And I'm not really sure expensive surgery on vocal cords is the way to go either...
     
  12. XXReye

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    The most important thing to know is that everyone is different. Some transpeople have known since they were kids, some come to realize it later in life. And people change how they identify over time, too.
    For your second question, the best thing to do would be to ask the person what they'd prefer you call them in their past. Some will want you to edit the past references to reflect their true self, others might want to be called by the biological sex they were at the time.
    As a general rule though, if you can't ask the person, I would stick with calling them by the gender they identify as in the present.
     
  13. Katelynn

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    Another very important piece of information I've just discovered last nite on CAMH's website is that most surgeos will not operate for GRS if you are not smoke-free. Looks like I'll be adding another reason to my 'reasons to quit smoking' list. Not a big issue for me, I've been trying to quit for a bit now, this just gives me a HUGE reason to push myself towards that goal!
     
  14. Hot Pink

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    Addressing Transphobia
    Transphobia is a growing concern as transgendered people gain more recognition in the media and on the internet. What is it and how does it effect transgendered people and everyone else?

    What is transphobia?
    Transphobia is an irrational fear of transgendered people. It is the transgender equivalent to homophobia. Examples of transphobic behaviors: avoidance of transgendered people, irrational anger toward transgendered people, and harsh judgments of transgendered people without giving them a chance to explain themselves. Examples of a harsh judgments: referring to transgendered people as delusional or insecure.

    "Stop being angry."
    People will often ignore the plights of the transgender community by claiming that we're "overreacting" or being "over-emotional." Because, as we know from history, only attention whores complain when they're being oppressed and want it to stop. That's why we still have slaves, sell our daughters, and treat people of different skin colors as animals.

    Transgendered People are Mentally Disturbed
    While Gender Identity Disorder may be listed as a mental disorder, there's a significant amount of new evidence that says that it's biological--a birth defect of the brain. Many therapists don't see it as a mental disorder.

    Crossdressers are just people who challenge gender roles. They're not mentally disturbed, they just enjoy the gender roles of the opposite sex. Nobody has a problem when their daughter wants to wear pants, play sports, and wear blue, but everyone is up in arms when their son wants to wear dresses, play with dolls, and wear pink.

    Both of these instances are cases of crossdressing. Why is one socially acceptable and the other isn't? It's because we live in a patriarchal society, so girls adopting masculine traits is seen as empowering; whereas, boys adopting feminine traits is seen as weak.

    I wouldn't date a transgendered person, even if they're transsexual and post-op.
    If the only reason you're not dating someone is because they are a transgender person, you are transphobic.

    I'm not comfortable working with a transgendered person.
    Transgender people are just like you. They're at work trying to earn a pay check. If they are doing something else that makes you uncomfortable--like blasting music--that's another story. If they are otherwise respectable of other people and not doing anything to offend you--other than existing--then you are transphobic.

    You're attractive, but I'm not gay.
    This is relative. If the person you are attracted to is a crossdresser--or some other gender variant person--this is a different story. While some may be able to overcome physical sex, not everyone can. If you genuinely like someone and enjoy their company, perhaps you can overcome it, though. It is worth a shot.

    If the person is transsexual, then that individual is essentially their preferred sex. If you are a man, then saying this to a transwoman is highly offensive and isn't as transphobic as it's homophobic. If the thing keeping you from dating a transsexual is fear of being seen as gay, then it is homophobic. This is relevant for transmen and women as well.
     
    #54 Hot Pink, Aug 2, 2011
    Last edited: Aug 2, 2011
  15. Leif

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    I've really enjoyed reading through this. Enjoyed isn't the right word, it's been really educational reading through it. It's something I needed to see because it's exactly what has been on my mind.
    From a very young age I knew I was bisexual, it was never much a surprise to my parents. However it was still a very religious household so I wasn't allowed to "do that stuff" in the house. Along with that my mom was always trying to make me more feminine. I think she believed that would somehow "fix" me.
    The thing is, I've never felt particularly feminine. When other girls were playing with barbies I was playing with my brothers old he-man action figures. Then puberty hit and I hated myself. I couldn't hide the fact that I was a girl anymore. For a few years my morning routine involved taping my chest down, but after a while that didn't help either. I wore sports bras, baggy clothes and jackets all the time. On the other hand I wasn't allowed to leave the house unless I put make up on first. (once again my mom trying her best to make me more feminine) To rebel I cut my hair ridiculously short.
    Around the time I turned 14 my mom threw out most of my clothes and told me it was time to grow up. I was unhappy already so I thought, eh why not try the whole girl thing. I started wearing skirts and low cut tops. I hated it, but boys started paying attention to me more so that was a plus. I kept myself busy and got really good at pretending I was fine.
    I suffered from horrible depression and anxiety because I was hiding my real self. And now at 21 I'm starting to finally figure things out. After years of lying to myself it's hard to distinguish what I really want and what I've forced myself to believe. It's incredibly hard for me to say it, but I know in my heart that I am not a woman. But I'm working on it. Finding this site and reading other peoples stories has helped me more then anything else.
    Maybe this wasn't the proper place to share my story but I just felt the need to in hope that someone will read it and learn from my mistakes. Don't give into what society wants you to be. Be who you want to be and who you really are because when it gets down to it that's what's going to bring you peace and happiness.
     
  16. solarcat

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    Gender Pronoun:
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    It's difficult to figure that one out. It's lik muscle memory- you spend enough time acting a certain way, and it sort of becomes your default setting. One reason I come here is because I can act lik myself without caring what people think. Helps to figure out who I am.

    Well put.
     
  17. Haberdasher

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    @kiersten - I've heard this link is helpful to those with voice concerns: ‪candiFLA's Channel‬&rlm; - YouTube (if it doesn't take you to the proper video she has "voice lessons" near the bottom of her videos on her channel)
     
  18. Katelynn

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    Thanks sooo much Haberdasher, it's probably the single greatest thing I'll ever worry about when it comes to passing in public...
     
  19. Ettina

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    I don't agree. I think it could be an orientation thing.

    See, I've known a couple of FtMs. (Oddly enough, never met an MtF, even though they're more common.) One was post-op, one pre-op. Both passed quite well. However, both had a somewhat feminine look to them, which is uncommon but not unheard of in cis males. (Sort of like many male anime characters.)

    I respect their identity, and refer to them as male. But some part of my brain automatically treats the two FtMs I met, as well as cis males with a similar appearance, as being girls. It's hard to explain. It's like, when I think of a person, I get a certain 'feeling' of them, almost like a color except nonvisual, and this roughly corresponds with gender for most people. But a few people get misclassified by that feeling. I can easily override that feeling to use male pronouns and so forth (as long as others around me aren't using the wrong pronoun - I tend to automatically echo other people's pronoun use), but it's still there.

    Now, I'm asexual. But I suspect if I did have sexual desire, that inner feeling would be more important than my conscious opinion in determining my sexual feelings towards them.
     
  20. Hot Pink

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    This thought puts transgender people outside of the gender binary, which may be okay with some people but not for me. You're also quoting from a post I made a while back and I'm not the same person anymore. I'm not a trans woman. I am a woman that happens to be trans. I consider myself female.

    There are people who are sexually attracted to people who are specifically trans. There are even some who exclusively are only attracted to trans people. There's nothing wrong with this, but people of varying orientations can date trans people. One of my trans friends is in a relationship with a cis man who has never had a relationship with a trans woman before. He had never even thought about it before. He considers himself heterosexual and heteroromantic.

    Not sure what you're trying to get at here. Are you bragging about your ability to read trans men? If you think of them as women, you're not really respecting them. Not saying anything and honoring their pronouns while thinking of them as women only means you're tolerating them. There's a big difference. Don't get me wrong: I'm glad that you call them by their preferred gender, but thinking of them as something outside of men is pretty insulting.
     
    #60 Hot Pink, Nov 20, 2012
    Last edited: Nov 20, 2012