Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Charni, Dec 21, 2011.
when you cheat, in the end, your only really cheating yourself.
Is really upset because if god crerated love and acceptance why dosnt the world get a dam grip and just do it love respect care about others and their feelings
(*hug*) Thank you.
I hope you can work something out with your mom. Parents can be like that. I think they get better about not micromanaging as much as we get older. It's still annoying in the meantime, though. :dry:
Why can't people accept minorities? Living in a majority-minority and incredibly diverse county, you'd expect my white friends to be somewhat more tolerant than average, but constantly I hear black and asian jokes (usually the asian jokes are directed at me, even though I'm white, because I speak Japanese) all the time! I mean, Jesus wasn't white, so why should you mock people who don't fit your mold?!
Life has a strange sense of humor...
I decided to look into a free dating/socializing website today. It took a while for me to get my profile setup, but overall things were going well. I found someone who sounded very interesting and even lived on campus. Then I looked at her profile picture. She looks exactly like my stinkin' ex-roommate. I mean, I had to read through her profile a couple times to make that they weren't really the same person.
Predictably, none of the other matches looked promising.
All I have to say is:
When someone e-mails you read and respond to it!
I mean it could be something for instance....ME COMING OUT TO YOU!
GOD, MAKE ME SIT AND WAIT WHY DON'T YA!
If rumours of my being homosexual make people ostracize me, what will it be like when I really do come out? AGH
How was I supposed to know that I was supposed to keep my receipts for my university textbooks? No one told me they were tax deductable and now people are angry at me because I had almost $1000 in textbook cost that we can't get back because I threw out the receipts. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW IF YOU DON'T TELL ME.
college textbooks are tax deductible? D:
Apparently they are in Canada at least.
You may try to take the high road all the time, but if cheaters, liars, and pretenders are not only not punished, but REWARDED, what can you do? If you're one of the only people who obeys traffic laws, what's it worth if people who DON'T obey them crash into you? How's it fair is it if you care about yours' and other people's lives, and someone who doesn't care about his/her own life takes yours with them? If everyone cheats and lies to get ahead, and you try to be a good, honest, fair person only to be left to pick up the debris while they continue their destructive race to the top, is it worth it to even try? If you try to make a difference in the world, and the only people who have truly made a difference have cheated and lied to do so, should you do the same? If the only people who get jobs lied and behaved aggressively to succeed in their interviews, should people whose natural inclination is to be modest and self-effacing have to go against their own natures to get jobs, even if they have the qualifications? Why should I have to dress like a woman, wear makeup, and have cute accessories for people to respect me and think I'm beautiful?
Thanks for this opportunity to post. I have something on my mind...
I am far from Christian, far from religious, and far from spiritual. I don't believe in "God" but I continue to search for logic in people's opinion. I live in Georgia and I'm sick of everyone giving God credit for stupid :***:. This has been angering me for the last few days.
What the heck is up with everyone thinking that everything is a blessing!?!? This is outrageous. God is not responsible for every time your on schedule to class, you meet someone cool, someone looks at you right, someone is found alive after a horrible earthquake, when someone recovers from cancer, when the electricity turns on after a power outage, when you're finally are pleased with your self image, when you wake up on time for work/school when your alarm clock failed to go off, you are allowed to give blood when you were't before, when you're on time to work, when you get a new replacement phone, or anything else that can happen on its own. (EVEN IF THE CHANCES OF IT HAPPENING ARE LOW, IT CAN STILL HAPPEN!)
I mean, if were were to give god all the credit for the good things, let's also recognize that he allows sexual assault, torture, killing, violence in general;
he allows earthquakes, hurricanes/tornados, blizzards, landslides, floods, and other natural disasters that had ended more lives than we know;
let's also recognize that he (directly or indirectly) allowed for the creation of parasites, diseases, and disorders that kill, incapacitate, or impair millions -probably billions- of people around the world.
I understand the arguments for miracles and blessings. I understand the argument of our standards vs. God's standards and our "limited perspective as humans." I understand when some people say that God didn't cause something. But we also have to realize that he's letting them happen. Some people say that he's causing good though the use of disastrous events. This is just so wrong and inefficient to me...
You're telling me that the god of the universe, who hardens the hearts of people and gives others courage, needs to allow for the death of thousands/millions in order to get a point across? You're telling me that the god who created the cosmos needs to allow the mother to overdose on pain killers in front of her helpless child because that's going to help the child? You're telling me that some good can come out of millions having HIV/AIDS in Africa and that he doesn't want to stop it because it's doing good? I'm telling you, domino effect of these tramatic events in people's lives causes more harm than good (whether it's in the form of mental distress, physical illness/death, or just sheer pain).
You have to be kidding. If that's the god you serve, then I don't want anything to do with him anyway. I refuse to acknowledge him for the good if I have to cover his :***: for the bad. I refuse to think that god works in such a cruel way.
GAHHHHH! It just happened again!!!! BlahhhhHH!H!!!!
"God has blessed me richly with so many wonderful family and friends. Thanks for all the birthday wishes! Ya'll make me smile!"
i already ranted a whole bunch elsewhere, but this is the part i didn't get into and it's something that has bothered me since i was a child: my mom's younger sister died of liver cancer caused by alcoholism nearly 20 years ago. my mom's sister was obviously my aunt, but she was also my sister's biological mother. so for my entire life i have felt like my relationship with my aunt is not as important as a relationship with a sister or a mother. i feel like i can't even mention her in conversation. like i can't possibly miss or love her as much as my mom or my sister miss and love her. or even feel anything at all. and now i am an aunt to my sister's son and it hurts me when i think that my relationship with him will be viewed as inferior for all kinds of reasons that probably exist in no one else's head by my own. because i view my relationship with my biological aunt as inferior to everyone else's relationship with her, and then factor in that even though i have always called my sister my sister she is biologically my cousin which makes my nephew my biological cousin. and i love that my family isn't typical and i love everybody in it and i love my nephew and i love that i'm his aunt so i hate that i still feel this way and i just don't know what to do about it.
Man, oh, man, am I in a rotten mood. Everything's pissing me off. It's just one of those "I hate the goddamn world" days.
I'm sick of my family and friends belittling me.
I'm sick if being unnoticed. Most people in my senior class come up to me and think I'm a freshman-___-
I go to school. Do my best. Try my hardest to get my work in on time, come home make dinner, make something to drink, clean the house, for what? To get 'oh you could have done betters,' and have them yelling cause I haven't taken the trash out, while my brothers sit on their asses, playing their stupid fucking Xbox on full blast at 3 in the fucking morning! Like what kind of shit is that? And plus my patents give them credit for shit that I did? No fucking sir. I did it. I do everything, and I get nothing but yelling and their 'dissapointed' look. I hate it. I hate them. I just hate my life.
I am so pissed right now! I've gone to this one forum for almost 5 years and it's being attacked by another website for no reason! Some members from their site came over a while ago and everything was fine for a while then one of the members became an administrator on the site for reasons unknown. This member, now an admin, let's call him Z, teamed up with another member from his merry band of forum trashers (lets call him C) and began creating havoc.
It was small scale havoc but they were essentially posting spam posts and racy images while saying it was okay under the forum rules. (Which it was not.) The rest of the staff tolerated it for a while but the rest of the forum began to rebel against Z and C but still nothing was being done by the staff. Formal complaints were written and lots of people left the site, some not to return. A large number of staff even stepped down. Eventually Z gets de-admined by the site creator, then eventually banned.
Things begin to turn normal for a while but then Z comes back using his knowledge of system glitches and bans all the mods and admins and reveals all hidden boards. That mess was eventually cleaned up but a few days ago he or one of his cronies deleted all the posts from the forum database, slowly, starting at the beginning and heading all the way back to 2005 with no one to stop them. It was eventually restored from a backup but today they did it again, this time in one fell swoop.
I have learned that Z is offering to stop but only if he becomes unbanned from the site. I don't think there's any way that will ever happen so he's effectively forcing us to DELETE OUR SITE and remake it from scratch.
We didn't do anything to their community. They came onto our site, acted like jackasses then get pissed off when they get banned, despite the NUMEROUS warnings they received. Now they're destroying the site just because they are that petty.
I'm not a violent person but I want to shove Z's keyboard up his ass for being such a PETTY, CHILDISH MORON! tUMUt
yesterday at my job, i felt like the knob on the other side of the closet door was being played with by various people at my job unintentionally. my manager was playing with the knob as well as my assistant manager and some customers. i talked to my manager about how something was going to happen relating to the weather and he just went into a rant about how america is going to go to hell and a handbasket because of gay people. he started saying something about sodom and gomorrah, men marrying men, how same sex couples can't reproduce and whatever. now as a gay guy in the closet, i felt uncomfortable to the point where i didn't even bother to challenge what he said and even cosigned him to make sure that he didn't even suspect it. he's the same ethnicity of my parents and my parents too have some strong homophobic views.
then my assistant manager mentioned about where my girlfriend was at. she constantly ask about if i have a girlfriend or not so she can gossip to whoever.
i also constantly kept on running into gay guys at my job. 4 gay guys and i think another guy who i think is in the closet with his wife and two kids. i was like "what the fuck?" is this some coincedence of something? all these gay guys at coming into my job. the thing is.... i bet none of those dudes knew that i was gay either. their gaydars didn't go off. haha. i also felt really uncomfortable around the women at my job fearing that i might be in a situation where they might flirt with me and i wouldn't flirt with them back to show that i was interested in them because i'm not. so it's like i'm holding the closet door knob from someone opening it.
hell, i'm not ready to come out and to top it off, i'm afraid of what the hell might happen. will i get fired if i were to tell my boss that i'm gay? what the hell would happen at my job? what about coming out to my parents? you know, basically, i look at the whole thing like what will i lose and what will i gain from coming out? one thign that scares me is the fact that i'll be alone. the fact that i'll have nobody. i feel that i won't have any friends to chill with that have the same interests as i do and can have fun with, no family, and i also fear that i won't be able to find a partner or a boyfriend since i have that particular issue right now. am i getting myself into a world of despair, hopelessness, pain, misery when i'm simply okay right now despite everything not being the way i want it to be.
i hate to say it but i'm very comfortable with the lie that i'm living as it benefits me in opposed to living with the truth. the truth hurts. i feel at ease thinking about how easier my life would be if i were to live by the truth but i also think about all the things that i would lose as well. no friends, no family, no boyfriends, no love, and living in loneliness. is this really worth it in the end?
if I'm worth loving, then it shouldn't matter what sins I've committed, or if what I am doing is something that you think is a sin... Christ died for us while we were still in our sins, and calls us to be like Him.
so if you love me, then you should love me - and be willing to eat with me - even if you think I am still in my sin. Just as Christ ate with prostitutes and tax collectors.
especially since all I'm trying to do is work on accepting and being myself.
you will NEVER know how much what you have said has hurt me, but I want you to know that I will ALWAYS love you, always want to be your friend, always hope to be included, always attempt to include you in my life... even though we might disagree.
you wouldn't threaten to disconnect from me socially if I told you I was still cutting and not interested in ever stopping. you would be upset but I know you would still be there in my life.
why is this any different, especially if you consider that I am making this "choice" only because I have learned that I NEED to in order to be healthy and happy in my life?
I can't BELIEVE that my friendship is worth so little to you, that you only want to keep it if I am willing to continue on a path that I have found to be destructive to my mental health. I can't believe that you would toss me aside like that. so is THIS the "unconditional" love that God calls us to? :tears: