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Tatoos and being LGBTQ

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Dionysios, Feb 15, 2019.

  1. Dionysios

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    A couple of days ago my wife asked me what tatoo I would get now that I am out. She wondered if I would get a tatoo of a LGBT emblem on my chest or elsewhere on my body. I was startled because I wasn't thinking about get a tatoo. My wife assumed that most gay people, as part of coming out, will publically proclaim their sexuality with some permanent ink.

    Since when did being gay mean you had a tatoo? True, I've seen some gay porn stars on video sporting tats, but lots of straight people have them too.

    My wife's question made me think. Now I'm wondering if I should celebrate my coming out by getting a tatoo. Have any of you, as part of coming out, had yourself inked? If so, what emblem did you opt for? Thanks!
     
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  2. Nickw

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    OK. Far from an expert here so take this for what it's worth. I've been with about ten men (various levels of intimacy). One had tats...one.

    I wonder if the rest weren't really gay? Hmmm.
     
    #2 Nickw, Feb 15, 2019
    Last edited: Feb 15, 2019
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  3. Dionysios

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    Too funny! Perhaps they were just broke and couldn't afford one. *laugh*
     
  4. Chiroptera

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    I've never heard of tattoos being "officially" part of the coming out process. :astonished:

    I have a tattoo, but it isn't LGBT related. However, that's not a bad idea for a future one. :slight_smile:
     
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  5. Nickw

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    I'm thinking they were straight or they would have gotten tattoos.
     
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  6. Poofter

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    I’m getting a unicorn piece done. I hope someone preserves it if I die because it will truly be a work of art. Some get ink some don’t, I think it’s a personal preference. I have seen guys with rainbow bear or wolf paw prints, various rainbows, pride flags, bear flags, one guy had a globe tramp stamp. I dunno. It is what you make of it.
     
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  7. johndeere3020

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    I have three, A simple brown cross with green ivy wrapped around it, the three nails that were used in it with blood dripping from them, and a ring of thorns around my arm. The thorns have been half shaded for several years. My first thought was if I was going to hell for being attracted to girls and GUYS the devil could see them every day and screw off! :middle_finger: I was going to finish the thorns someday when I felt "right" with God, IDK we still have to have a little talk to clear some things up, At least I am right with myself!

    Dean
     
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  8. Waffless

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    I'm glad you didn't have a negative response to what your wife said, as soon as I read that I was surprised because I never thought about it either I know personally I never plan on getting a tattoo or body piercing maybe ill get a neck tattoo but nothing large and always something that can be hidden, and I think you should celebrate
     
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  9. Razorbacks

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    I’ve never considered it a gay or straight thing or an official part of coming out. With that said, I am planning to get a tattoo to mark this transformative period in my life. But, I have lots of tattoos already, so I’m not a good barometer for this, lol! If you want one, that’s great. If not, that’s great too!
     
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  10. bearheart

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    Welcome to the gay world @Dionysios, now you have to get the gay stamp! Lol.

    I have no tattoos and don't have the intention of having any. It's naive to link tats to being gay or as a coming out action. You have to be already interested in tattoos in the first place. I know a gay friend of mine who got a bear claw on one of his calfs after coming out and getting married to his husband. It was his first but his husband had a few before coming out himself.

    But it's a weird idea to have a gay "mark" I find funny to think this way.
     
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  11. Dionysios

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    To be truthful my friend I never gave the matter much thought. My son has lots of tatoos and a piercing as well, but it was never in the back of my mind to do it myself. I haven't decided one way or the other.

    My brother once had his 3rd wife's name tatooed on his wrist. Now that he is with wife #4, that didn't look so good, so he had to have it retatooed. The issue of having something permanent on me causes me to really ponder if I want to do this at all.
     
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  12. bearheart

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    I agree, one's taste, believe, preference and style change with time. What we love today we might not like tomorrow and vice versa. So unless you really like tattoos, and some people do, and don't mind the long lasting ink on your body, then go for it. Otherwise you don't have to. I don't think that anyone should be influenced by "main stream" trends nor by anyone else's fashion nor opinion especially when it comes to your own body.
     
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  13. Destin

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    I don't have any tattoos, and don't really like them...although there was this one time in high school that a couple friends and I drunkenly decided we were all going to get "69" tattoos on our feet. Yes, that type of 69... I'm very glad we didn't go through with that haha.
     
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  14. Dionysios

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    My friend, so glad that you didn't either! *laugh*
     
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  15. OnTheHighway

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    Amongst other things, tattoos used to be a mark for individualized counter culture, non conformity and antisocial messaging; however, tattoos are now in the mainstream. Look at many musicians, actors and social media influencers today and you will see a plethora of tattoos - whether straight or gay.

    That said, being LGBT is inherently counter culture and goes against the heteronormative scipt. Hence, the connection would seem to make sense that tattoos are prevelant in LGBT culture.

    In addition, the expression of counter culture is often done in adolescence. And those that embrace their sexuality need to go through their own period of “gay” adolescence so to speak. In the later in life threads, we have often referred to that as a second adolescence. So during this second adolescence, as it relates to later in lifers, tattoos are used to express acceptance of ones true identity, which goes against the heteronormative script.

    When I went through my first adolescence, I had an earring (which I removed upon graduating university). I always wanted a tattoo. But family pressure stopped me from getting a tattoo then. Later in life when I initially embraced my sexuality I did get several tattoos. While I no longer have any desire to get any new tattoos, the ones I got are very meaningful to me and do reflect a significant milestone in my life.
     
    #15 OnTheHighway, Feb 16, 2019
    Last edited: Feb 16, 2019
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  16. Contented

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    Likewise when I embraced my homosexuality it freed me to do things I had always wanted but was afraid of what others would think. I did get a 2 tattoos , one LGBT oriented but discrete and I got my ear & nipple pierced because I like the look, thought it looked sexy not really related to coming out. The tattoo was however and wouldn’t change doing it as was very significant to my awakening gay sexuality.
     
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  17. Nickw

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    I went for a long and very strenuous technically difficult ride with a hot bike racer last spring. I struggled to keep up and had several wipeouts.

    That evening as we were fooling around, he commented that he had never considered a tat but did like mine.

    I looked down at my calf and there was a very distinct gouge in my flesh of the chain ring garnished with blood and grease. I often have thought since then that if I ever got a tattoo that would be a good one!
     
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  18. quietman702

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    My first tattoos were partially about my sexuality, the one was a purple rose on my right butt cheek lol. The one related to my coming out was a full Phoenix. The rebirth of the new me.
     
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  19. 1cgd

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    I also have many, and plan to add one eventually that expresses my pride in a subtle way.
     
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  20. OGS

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    No tattoos here. I have to say I never really thought of them as a gay thing. If I had to compare I would say that in my experience straight people are slightly more likely to have them than gay people. I just asked my husband and he insists straight people are quite a bit more likely to have them. The only kind of tattoo I ever really considered was one of those tribal upper arm band ones. In my twenties I was forever finding myself with a bunch of shirtless gay guys dancing in these gatherings that were really tribal in the best possible sense of the word. I still sometimes think about that feeling. Some of the guys would invariably have those tribal bands and it just seemed so appropriate...
     
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