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Talking negatively about the deceased

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Tightrope, Mar 20, 2020.

  1. Tightrope

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    Doing this is considered taboo or bad karma by some people. Other people think it's okay if it's true. If a person is a public figure, it seems to be fair game because they are not family members and friends. It's journalists and reporters who are doing it for their job. What about everyday people talking negatively about people they knew who are deceased?
     
  2. Kyrielles

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    Well it depends on what a person considers negative. Like I don't agree with talking negatively about a deceased person because of the way they looked, sounded, or were as a person. However I don't consider it talking negatively about a deceased person if the talk is based on something factual and horrible that they've done. (Ex: child molesters, murderers, etc.) Because imo a fact shouldn't be considered negative, it's just that, a fact, no matter how negative it may sound.

    And also I don't believe in superstitions or taboos.
     
  3. HM03

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    If it's a fact, then yeah, people should be able to say it. Nobody is pretending Hitler was a good person even though he's dead.

    Obviously not nearly to that degree - it's not something I actively bring up, but I'm not going to pretend that family members that have died were perfect, because they weren't.

    Things that were not proven by law or observation are just rumoury and gossipy. I feel like it's wrong when the person can no longer stand up for themselves.
     
    #3 HM03, Mar 20, 2020
    Last edited: Mar 20, 2020
  4. Michael

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    As long as you don't hurt anyone, in theory you can say whatever you want.
    I don't believe on bad karma or an after life. Dead people look quite dead to me.
    Another thing is to be honest and pointing out flaws of somebody who is dead. Doesn't make any difference, it is still gossip somehow. It can help someone going through grief, to avoid putting the deceased one at the top, on some unhealthy throne.

    I'm ok with people shitting in my grave. I'm sure I won't mind, so how could I ever be bothered if they make remarks on my (insert body part here) size, or all the mistakes I surely made, even those I wasn't aware of? Let them talk, see if I care...
     
  5. Poofter

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    I am a person who always tries to find the good in others and speak positivity about them. Just the way I am. But facts are facts, and while I can say so and so was good in this aspect. If they had negative traits I try to not mention them. If they were a person who had bad things, and someone brings them up I see no problem with discussing them as long as it stays factual. The rumors and gossip are what I consider speaking negatively and regardless of them being alive or dead. That kind of y’all shouldn’t be done to begin with.

    As for famous people. For the most part all you know of them is what is reported. I also see no problem with discussing them in that manner. Example Pablo Escobar, head of the Medellín Cartel. It was reported that he was a Drug Kingpin, who used murder and extortion to run his business. He in his earlier days was also very charitable to the poor in the city. But to speculate on who he was as a person I can’t.
     
  6. Michael

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    Just like Al Capone did, and many others. It's true you cannot tell much about people you didn't even met.

    Yes, you can discuss the mistakes of a deceased person, but what's the point? What can be gained? When you've got a problem, you tell someone straight at their faces, so they can change their atittude (I feel like a mobster right now...)
     
  7. Poofter

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    conversation would be the point. That’s it.
     
  8. Loves books

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    If someone is a horrible person and they die I don’t think I can only talk about their good points. If my dad died right now I’d have to lie to find something nice to say about him. He’s mean, rude, narcissistic and was downright malicious at times. I look back through my childhood and have no nice memories of him. I have no intention of pretending he was the perfect dad after he dies.I wouldn’t speak ill of a person I didn’t know well.As for people we don’t know, look through a history book and try not to speak ill of half 5he people in there.
     
  9. Michael

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    There are three choices for a conversation - Persons, things/events or ideas.
    Of course, that's up to you.
     
    #9 Michael, Mar 26, 2020
    Last edited: Mar 26, 2020
  10. Mihael

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    I don’t think it’s a matter of superstition, it’s a matter of being polite. Taboos are a matter of being polite. Close ones of the person who died are going to feel hurt when someone says negative things about them.
     
  11. Austin

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    Maybe it’s taboo because of the similar idea of not talking bad about people behind their back or when they’re not there to defend themselves. I think it mostly includes gossip and such.
     
  12. RedEyeFlash

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    I think its fair game if you would have said it while they were alive. And like when people are alive, it depends who you say it to.
     
  13. donnyback

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    The dead cannot defend themselves. In most ethical systems, a person has the right to confront their accuser and attempt to defend themselves, or choose a person to defend them. The dead obviously cannot do this, so it's generally considered impolite to attack them. This idea has been around for centuries.
     
  14. donnyback

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    person has the right to confront their accuser and attempt to defend themselves