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So understanding my stance in the lgbt

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Pablo4541, Sep 12, 2017.

  1. Pablo4541

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    I do have therapist and have been diagnosed I haven't been able to afford her these last couple times so thats kind of why I have been lurking on here to sort out my thoughts.
     
  2. Destroyed

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    Why would church elders and republican politicians, that supported homophobic laws, go out of there way, to be caught with male escorts?
    Also, just because one considers themselves a self accepting lgbt individual, doesnt mean internalized homophobia has ended. Before gay marriage was passed, 10 years reversal some gays didnt approve of gay marriage. All sorts of flawed excuses were given by them- internalized homophobia. After it passed, there stance on it changed.
    Internalized homophobia or shame, is very powerful, especially in a world that is not yet fully accepting of lgbt folks. One isnt given tools from childhood to accept themselves and for someone thats sexually fluid and trans, it may even be more difficult as what they are exposed to is only heteresexual and cis gender perspectives all the way to adulthood, its continuously affirmed.

    Also your therapist needs to deal with your trauma , your molestation as a child. You need to heal from it to have a clear mind, as to who you are. For i dont understand how you were diagnosed with OCD before trauma therapy.

    And the fact your already able to imagine the last option a guy. Thats very deep and i wont use the prison option, for you arent in prison and sure as hell, a straight mans nightmare is being forced to do anything with another guy, before prison.

    For one to also claim that being lgb, means seeing yourself with a guy, in love married etc Thats a very shallow view of the community. For we erase those in the closet that find it difficult coming to terms with their sexuality, maybe due to religion or different factors, they cant even fathom a relationship.or sex with a guy if gay or bi/ with women if lesbian or bi, it would make them puke etc(internalized homophobia comes in there again)

    So at the end of the day, you know yourself better. Words can be written here and twisted to affirm ones personal biases or objectives and equally gain responses that affirm a bias.

    I hope very much that your therapist has dealt with your trauma as a child. I'll passionatly insist, on that bit of therapy, as its the most important subject that they need to deal with. You need to heal from that and its important. If your therapist brushes that bit off, then change the therapist for another better one, one that understands your situation and is open minded.
    Not all of them are proffesional, some just want to make more money and they,'ll jump to the fastest diangnosis they find to push time.
     
    #22 Destroyed, Sep 14, 2017
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2017
  3. Destroyed

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    Sorry on the therapy bit.My suggestion would be, you try a forum for victims of rape and molestation. To gain methods of healing from trauma, equally the impacts its had on others lives. That can be a more healthy start.
     
  4. Pablo4541

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    Now I don't want to be rude but you really make a lot of assumptions. Like I was just saying as a last option as literally that a last option. You also tell me I need to not jump to conclusions about ocd and I tell you im diagnosed and then you start going on about how therapist aren't always right.

    Then you compare me to paid professional political figures. Who make hubdres of thousands to pass certain laws. They have a lot more reason to lie than I do.

    It seems like you just want me to say Im gay or bui but in reality sir Im not sure. You are right I do know myself better than anyone else and that why I roll my eyes every time I read your comments because you are giving suggestions and making claims that have kind of already happened I have a professional consoler who graduated from a top 5 university in my state.

    With all thus internilized homophobia you seem to be referring to people that have been closeted for pretty much there whole life then decide to come out and have trouble with there own stuff. Which would make sense if I had been a self hating 40 year old but in reality I have been pretty open im trying to understand myself since I was 12. I told my grandmother about porn hanits. I told my family I was bisexual at 17. I don't have really all this pent up self hate or motivation to hide since almost everyone knows.

    As far as the prison thing guys. Like I already said I physically could that doesn't mean I would enjoy it.

    Just like how certain gay men could physically get an erection and have sex with a women doesn't necessarily mean they would enjoy it. Im sure you will say something else but I have tried to make you understand.

    Pushing a personal bias isn't what im here for sir im just trying to understand myself better.
     
  5. Pablo4541

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    You also seem like you think my abuse my be a factor in all this which confses me because I know A LOT about abuse survivors and questioning your sexuality and acting out are so extremely common but then you would call that internalized homophobia which it just goes in circles,
     
  6. PatrickUK

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    It's fair to say that most straight people have occasional thoughts and/or fantasies about the same sex and it doesn't cause them a great deal of stress or anxiety. Even if they follow through with their curiosity and experiment once or twice it doesn't necessarily make them bisexual or gay and they live very happily as they are, knowing the extent of their feelings, but still identifying as straight. Nobody can say they are wrong.

    You referred to the Kinsey scale and asked where you might be placed and I would say 1 or 2, based purely on what you have told us. It's important to remember that Kinsey believed very few people are exclusively straight or gay and that it's normal to sit somewhere between 0 and 6. What do you think though?
     
  7. Pablo4541

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    The thing is that I really agree with what you said. When I think logically I did the experimentation to figure it out I found an answer but my own mind will race for hours honestly I think this is more of a mental problem yhen a sexual problem. I have enough experiences and factors to gage what's going on. But it seems like my mind wants to find more data and compare and illness has no logic which is probably why my brain nevee rests.