Hello, I'm new on here. I have a lot to say and don't really have anyone in my life right now who would understand. I'm a 24 year old female and I am going through a confusing time. As of late I have really been considering going 100% lesbian and really focusing on finding a girlfriend and not consider boys. The reason I think about going on about this "focusing" is because generally I look really straight. I'm not the stereotype that people think of when they think lesbian. Therefore boys happen but I really just want to say I'm a lesbian but what if I meet a boy I like and then I'll be like "oh I guess I'm not a lesbian?" Any who, my close group of friends all know I have been interested in girls. I just got out of a relationship with a male that I lived with for a year. While we were living together we were like BFF's. We had sex maybe 1-3 times a month but most of the time I was over it really quickly. I don't know if that's because we are best as friends or if this is just me all around with heterosexual sex. I rarely went down on him the entire time we were together. In the past I've dated crappy men who I maybe had sex with once a week. I have had sex with 1 girl on a random night. She's my friend and ever since then I've had an endearment towards her. She will always be beautiful and we will always be each others first lesbian sex encounter. I think I have always admired women. The touch and the way a woman makes me feel. It's not even like I check out all girls that I find attractive. Occasionally I'll see or meet a girl and it's like a magnetic force. I just want to be around them and I can barely get my words out right and I just want to be with them. I just want them to be happy and I want to be the one making them happy. They are few and far between but the way they make me feel is different from any feeling I have ever had for a boy. What I'm trying to get at is I'm not sure if it's all in my head or not. I don't want to say I'm a lesbian and turn out to be straight. I find the term Bi extremely confusing and misleading. I'm really close to my family and they are a very traditional mexican conservative family. As far as they are concerned I'm straight as an arrow. I find it misleading if I'm bi and maybe in 5 years I find the woman of my life and then have to come out to my dear sweet parents that I'm a lesbian and marrying a woman. I guess I came here to look for support. I know the obvious thing to do is to date and see what i like and I will. It's just hard when there aren't a lot of lesbians around my town. That's another thing! How are women going to know Im into women if I only keep the secret that I'm bi with my close friends. If I say I'm a lesbian to every one I know I might contradict myself if I met a nice man. UGHH my brain. Anyway! I hope to hear your story or suggestions or critique or whatever
Are you attracted to men? If you are you are bisexual you can be attracted to both men and women. It doesn't matter if you end up with a man or a woman.
Uhh, I might not be the best at this, but forgive my typos (on mobile, autocorrect hates me) and I'll try to word this as coherently as I can manage. I feel as though, if you are attracted to many different sexes, it would hurt you in the Lon run to identify as straight or gay. If you find bi to be against your liking as an orientation I would suggest looking for terms with a wider umbrella? Like queer or pan. In my mind, sexuality, much like gender, is very fluid. There is no black and white (ie- gay or straight) but a lot of lovely shades of grey. I may not be the best person to offer advice, but sometimes its better to think outside labels. Who wants to be shoved in a box anyways? I am a very feminine lesbian, most people assume I'm straight because I don't fit into the I boxes or match their labels, sometimes youve gotta remember that labels, while useful, are not something you need to set in stone, things change and tides shift, sometimes its easier to go with something looser or nothing at all ^^
Being bisexual means being attracted to both men and women. It doesn't mean that you're attracted to both sexes equally and in the same way. Its okay to have a preference for one gender over the other if you're bi. It definitely sounds like you are bi to me. That's my opinion. You can meet other women at LGBT bars, clubs and events and through LGBT dating apps.
Thank you all. I suppose I am bi. But then again it's true that I don't need a label and just need to go with it. I'm going to look more into LGBT. I guess it's all just new to me and I have an understanding of it all I just need to hear it (or read it) from someone else.
I can relate to you in a way.. Though I am certain I am a Lesbian. I am feminine myself.. The hair, Makeup, Lipstick, Nailpolish, Skirts.. you name it. I am a girly girl and get confused for being straight alot. I can suggest to you that maybe wearing a rainbow bracelet or a female symbol intertwined with another could give off a lesbian vibe to other women. And if people in your family ask just say you like rainbows or you like the symbols. Yes you do sound very confused.. don't tie yourself up and drive yourself crazy with your own thoughts. Things will become clearer in time.. Try dating girls by being more obvious about your attraction towards women. If you're shy just smile and look at women alot. Good luck! (*hug*) x
