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Should I come out?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Pedro123, Jun 1, 2020.

  1. Pedro123

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Messages:
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    Location:
    Fortaleza
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    So... I have ever since 13 enjoyed thinking of men for sex. I used to enjoy the idea of being submissive and bottom. I've always liked women too, but way more in the emotional and affectional way and I'm not willing to accept that all of which I've felt until now was for nothing and not real as I'm also able to feel pleasure and enjoy thinking about them when I masturbate, and I've always enjoyed seeing them naked too. Although it's never given me 100% satisfaction and pleasure as the thoughts of a man do, it's also good because the guilt isn't there later so I used to keep switching.
    Okay, so I live in a household and I live among people that would never 100% accept it. I've just fixed some of my relationships with people and I have just so much to take care of in life. I have high functioning depression and I never feel like I'm good enough and problems just seem to come one after the other and pile up all the time. I tackle one problem then 2 other ones appear to compensate and both of them generally cause me a great degree of shame.
    I've been wondering if it would be okay for me even though my sexual feelings for men are stronger than for women to just be with women and how that can work out. I wouldn't get the same degree of pleasure and wouldn't be the kind of person who could do it like 3 times in a day and like it, but I want to know from people that either enjoy men more or exclusively for sex how it was to have relationships with women. I've heard even people who only fantasize about men generally enjoy sex with their girlfriends a lot.
    Do you guys think this is something alright for me to do? I mean just deny my feelings for men due to the environment I live in and the problems that I already have? And besides I've always been someone who didn't think of a relationship in terms of sex. I mean I've always seen the kissing hugging and just loving each other as so much more significant.
     
  2. Gaypjo

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    East U.S
    Gender:
    Male
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    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Denying who you are isn’t the best thing to do. Being your truest self isn’t meant to be easy. If you think that your parents wouldn’t be supportive I would not suggest coming out. That can get ugly really fast. At the same time you can’t reject part of yourself just because others do. Blunt answer to your question: would it be alright in that you’ll survive? Yes. I can’t answer whether or not it’s alright to you though. If your feelings for guys are strong they won’t just go away. It’s not an easy situation to be in. I’m probably not the best person to give an answer here but I did answer the best I could.
     
  3. Inlife88

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Chantilly, VA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I would go woth your feelings. Whatever makes you feel happiest, you should go with. If you think people will not be 100% accepting, you maybe surprised what happens. I have been exclusive to women, but I fantasize about being with a man regularly. I wluld go woth your gut and put yourself first because you are you.

    Peace and love