Hey guys. I think this might be kind of triggery, I'm not really sure, sorry :/ When I was in seventh grade, I went through a period of depression for a few months because something mildly traumatic happened and it fucked me up. What I would do a lot of the time was I would carry something small, sharp and metal around and leave jagged scratches all over my wrists and ankles and it made me feel better. I stopped eventually and now I can see that was self harm, but now when I get really stressed or sad, I always feel this urge to slam my head against a wall or something, or scratch myself, or just release the pressure on my skull in some way. I would give in sometimes when I get really overwhelmed and I'd have a panic attack and I'll start banging my head on something until I feel better. I'm not really sure what to make of that. Is that an urge to self harm? Or am I just being childish and doing the equivalent of, say, throwing things. I'm not sure how to say it, but people always say they feel like slamming their head on a wall when they get frustrated and I don't know if they're serious. Am I just doing the equivalent of throwing a tantrum? It seems like a silly thing to ask, but I'm really not sure if I'm just not controlling myself like everyone else or if I'm still carrying an urge to self harm like before. It happens infrequently and I've been thinking about it a lot. I always want to do it when I'm in a dark place but rational says I don't give myself head trauma.