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Sapiosexual and proud

Discussion in 'The Welcome Lounge' started by BernieUSA, Oct 20, 2024.

  1. silverhalo

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    Nobody wants you to feel bad either Ran, you are a great person offering great help and advice to people.
     
  2. Ran

    Ran
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    Aww, thank you. It's okay. I haven't been made feel bad. I just worry that people get confused, so which is why I feel the need to sometimes clarify, when I see that something can be misunderstood, like in this case that the label the person wishes to use is a sexual orientation. I do not wish to be meddling in what people want to call themselves as or invalidate anyone's feelings, but it's important to call things with their right names. It would be absolutely fine if this person would say for example that I'm attracted to intelligent people and call myself sapiosexual as I feel more comfortable with this label, then that would be absolutely fine. I'd have no problem whatsoever with it. You do not need to add sexual orientation to this at all. This is what does cause so much controversy.
     
  3. quebec

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    Ran..... I agree with you so much. Everyone has the right to "label" themselves as they wish. I am very happy to label myself as gay, in fact, I really needed that label. At the time I finally accepted that I am and always have been gay, I was feeling pretty lost and needed something to help ground me. That label was what helped me finally find my place in the world. My concern about the proliferation of labels is that they have started to become so complicated and so numerous that I fear we are starting to lose touch with reality. I absolutely DO NOT want to discourage someone from finding their place in this world...from finding "where they fit". Some people like a "dash" of water in their whiskey, but if you water down the whiskey too much, soon you have water with a "dash" of whiskey. Call yourself what ever you like, just don't expect others to jump on the wagon or to understand very well what you mean. I would rather that this entire subject did not cause a division among the LGBT community. We already have so much against us that we need to always work together and help each other. So let's agree to disagree and get on with loving each other, helping each other and above all... watching out for the young ones in our community who are so very vulnerable!
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
  4. chicadeoro

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    That made me smile, JT!

    On a more serious note, I agree with Ran and David. The proliferation of dubious sexual 'identities' doesn't do us - the LGTBQ+ community - any favours. In the eyes of many out there in mainstream society it makes us look like a joke. And it's up to us to quite rightly draw a line between those which are genuine and those which are mere preferences. So to get back to the point, I think yes it's absolutely fine to challenge the original poster and not to indulge ridiculous notions such as 'sapiosexual'.

    Beth
     
  5. Shehethey

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    I'm choosing to ignore most of the comments above, which really went sideways in many ways and did not even 'reply' to the original post. We are all presuming to know what 'BernieUSA' meant instead of just reading what it there with margin for misunderstandings, culture, etc. There is no need for therapy just because I find a new label which seems to describe me better than others...

    I don't know what I am in terms of sexual orientation (and I'm not that young either), but I know everyone have I dated before for more than once it was because I found them interesting. I definitely resonate with the term 'sapiosexual' :slight_smile:
    It's not about the gender, it's not about being pretty or ugly. I'm excited whenever I have a really interesting and deep conversation and when I find the other person is high on emotional intelligence too. It's the 'amicable challenge' in a conversation that gets my attention.
    So maybe this is not technically a sexual orientation but it's definitely a 'relationship preference'; after all, sex is not even on the table, if you're not interesting...
    In short, gender and sexual orientation are not the only things that bring people together. Let's celebrate that :slight_smile:

    And it feels to me like EC is open about this whole spectrum, even if there is no 'official list' and we cannot choose 'sapiosexual' as our label here. I'm Ok with the 'I'm exploring one'.