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Rough Day, Not Sure Why I am Posting

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by bsg75apollo, Aug 23, 2022.

  1. bsg75apollo

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    I'm not even sure why I am posting this, if it to vent, for sympathy, or something else. Today was just a really rough and stressful day for me. I'm frustrated, mad, and my self-esteem got trashed.

    Back in April in the process of her telling me she wanted a divorce, she told me that she was bi or at least bi-curious and I came out to her. It was something I was already working up the courage to do.

    My intentions were to just be free of the burdens of hiding. I was not looking for a divorce or even to have friends with benefits. None the less, I got tossed aside like a snotty tissue. I'm sure that she has a different viewpoint but from my perspective, after a year of me recovering from major physical and mental trauma, she realized that she didn't really sign on for the in sickness, for poorer, and in bad times part of the vows.

    I wasn't looking to start a new relationship, but now I find my self doing just that. Fortunately, the guy I am seeing is almost the polar opposite of her. I don't know if that is the reason or if it is because he's a guy, but I am finding it easier, more natural, and less awkward than any previous relationship

    I really don't know what my point is, but I'm posting it anyway.
     
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  2. Isbjorn

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    Sorry your day has been so stressful. I am not going to give you sympathy, but I am going to give you friendship and what support I can from here.

    From what I can see, you got a pretty raw deal and the way you were treaded isn't right. I agree, you needed to free yourself to be you. I just wish it had worked out better for you.

    This being said. I am excited for your new relationship. I hope things go well for you on that front. You deserve some good karma for a change. I look forward to hearing about your mystery man.

    I don't know why you posted either, but I am glad you did.

    Peace!
     
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  3. BiGemini87

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    I'm sorry things have gone so awry with your marriage; is there no hope of reconciling, or has she been pretty firm in things being over? I only ask, because if you're finally with someone right now who's making you happy, I'd hate for her to change her mind and throw everything into emotional chaos again. I guess the only thing you can hope is whatever is right for both of you is what comes to fruition.

    And you don't have to explain anything: EC is here to support you in all your endeavours, even if it just means letting you vent into the void.
     
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  4. bsg75apollo

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    In a counseling session, the counselor point blank asked her that question. She unequivocally answered that she had made up her mind and that she didn't want to be responsible for anybody, but herself. She has also started a relationship with a guy who is actually engaged and jus put in an offer on a house.
     
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  5. Isbjorn

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    Wow! That is crazy! Unless both are willing to communicate, compromise, and work toward staying together, it is a waste of time. Holy cow, sorry dude.
     
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  6. BiGemini87

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    I'm sorry to hear that. Her choices (for ill or otherwise) aside, I suppose this gives you cart blanche to do whatever you need/want in order to find happiness, though I know that probably comes as small consolation during the harder days.
     
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  7. bsg75apollo

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    For someone raised with a big helping of good old fashioned Catholic guilt it is actually a bit of a consolation. When my parents were giving me grief about starting to see someone, I was able to say to them, "When your wife says she wants a divorce, there is nothing that will change her mind, and she doesn't want to be responsible for anyone but herself, all it is at that point is just legal paperwork, so why shouldn't I move on?"
     
    #7 bsg75apollo, Aug 28, 2022
    Last edited: Aug 28, 2022
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