I'm ready to be honest. I like women and I always have. I have hidden it. I had a goal to be the perfect kid, to not make mistakes, to be the kid my dad will love, to be the support my mother needed, to be the exception in living life correctly in comparison with others around me. But I'm done. I finally arrived to that place were I understand. The church will run regardless of what I do. My parents don't need me to do anything, there affections aren't going to change. My children will always be mine. Everything I have been able to accomplish in my career I have work hard for and earned. I have no more reasons to lie to myself or the people that care about me. So it is time to make hard decision and help myself feel complete. I don't like the idea of a divorce but I know I can't be what he deserves. My kids a right to know what love looks and feels like. I don't want them to grow up like me. Questioning quietly and no having a clear idea of what a family and unconditional love feels and looks like. It's not going to be easy but it is time!
It is great that you feel that the time has come to be yourself and to embark on making the changes in your life that will allow you to be yourself; change and especially if it is change that we need to bring about, is of course never easy. From the sounds of it, you are ready for it though and it shows how much progress you have already made in being comfortable in your own skin and being ready in being yourself. (*hug*)
It can be so tough to let go of the image we have created for ourselves and our concerns of the opinions of others. Congrats on your progress and best wishes as you continue your journey.
My heart reaches out to you! I'm currently in a very similar moment, so I know how painful and scary it is. Hopefully things will work out for the best. In my own journey I now believe there's happiness waiting for me on the other side, so I believe there's also joy waiting for you in the future. Best of luck to you!
Sometimes I read in posts, material that resonates so well. The perfect kid is one such case. I dont have a clue either so now we are members of the same club. For decades I've had my guard up, never letting others in. I've got my work cut out for me for I want to know what unconditional love feels like.
Please feel free to do so. Writing out thoughts or the steps you would like to take can help in gaining clarity and/or insights.
Hey this is a great post, it is of course tinged with sadness that you felt you had to be all those things for people and of course still some way to navigate but I'm sure you will all be happier in the future. We will be here through your journey when you need us.
Good for you!! I came to the same place only two weeks ago. It was scary to have the conversation, but I feel good not hiding from the truth anymore.
I relate to that last paragraph so much! I'm at the end of my divorce and I really hope that one day my kids can see what a happy and healthy relationship looks like.
Yasss!! We are your cheerleaders!! You most of all deserve happiness!! And yes your children deserve to see the real you and happiness!! Go for it!! Good for you!! We are your supporters if you need a family to lean on !!
I salute u and your courage to come out there finally. Ive been on your stage like that when it is really tiring to keep ourselves from freedom when we all know we can be happier. It is scary i tell you ,i was pretty scared when i did it but what i did is for me to finally grasp my happiness like a feeling of this is the only time id do it. It was like a kind of now or never thing i did as i keep thinking “ when will i do it to free myself and be happy for who i am” and that thought stayed with me for quite awhile and made me strong to go out there and convinced that i would never grow old like 70 years old and regretting not coming out for the rest of my life regretting i didnt let myself be happier u know. Give yourself what u truly deserve and you owe that yourself. Wish you luck and im here to listen if you need me to.
