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questions abt woman on woman sex

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by ellief, Oct 15, 2020.

  1. ellief

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    Hi ! So I am a woman, and I've been thinking about sex with a woman recently, but I am a virgin, and have no understanding of how it works. What I see on porn never seems right, so if I were to actually catch myself in the situation, I wouldn't know how to have sex with a woman. What even qualifies as sex with a woman ? What feels good in woman on woman sex ? Everything seems more complicated with a woman, but I think its just because I was never thought how. Sorry this must seem like the weirdest most obvious question but I have absolutely no idea who to ask.
     
  2. Really

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    I don’t think you need to worry too much about what to do. As you’ve watched videos, you’ve got some idea of what’s possible but also know that when the time comes, I don’t think you’ll need help. If everything is feeling good enough to get intimate, it’ll all come naturally. It might be hard to imagine that now but if you’ve ever “helped yourself” and are prepared to communicate, you’ll be just fine.

    As far as what sex *is* for two women or any combination of people for that matter, I believe it’s any activity you mutually consent to engage in and enjoy which has the potential (but doesn’t necessarily) to lead to an orgasm.

    Maybe have a look at Scarleteen. I’m sure there’s good info there for you. :}
     
  3. LostInDaydreams

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    Hi @ellief,

    With regards to porn, much of the content and messages that it gives out are not representative of real life. It can cause people to have false expectations and beliefs about what sex should be like, what bodies should look like and also what gender roles should be. So, I would advise you not to use porn as your guide.

    As @Really says, communication makes a big difference. With that in mind, I would advise against rushing into anything before you are ready and waiting until you find somebody who you feel comfortable openly communicating with. Try not to worry; almost everyone has been in the same (or a similar) position.
     
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  4. ellief

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    Thanks for the website !
     
  5. Lin1

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    The good thing is that you don't need to ''know'' how to have sex with a woman. You just need to know how to communicate and be willing to have (however that may look like for you). Sex will very likely happen organically (or well it should) and most of the time, things flow naturally, what's important is communicating with your partner ''do you like that?'' "is that okay if...?" " would you mind...?" '' How about we...?" " Can I...?" asking for feedback and providing feedback is sexy so don't hesitate to ask and to share your needs to. Ultimately you both want to please each other and because each woman is unique, asking her what she likes specifically and listening to her needs/body language is what will make you a good lover.

    Experience doesn't equal good sex, good communication and good listening skills often very much does though. So as long as you are willing to listen and communicate, you should be fine!
     
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