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Questioning my Gender

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by ML1OO7, Mar 14, 2020.

  1. ML1OO7

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    Hi there I’m new here and basically lately I’ve been question if I am truly a trans woman. I was born male and have acted as such my whole life but there are certain things that make me question if I am supposed to be a woman. For starters, when I was a kid I used to tell my sister that I was a girl “because I can be” and we would play as if I was her sister and she would do my make up and stuff like that until she told our mother about it and i rejected the idea. After that I have always been more on the feminine side but I’ve always wanted to be more masculine because that’s how all my friends were and it was kind of expected of me. Fast forward to my high school years, I would wear my sisters clothing when no one was home and then I made a few friends that are female and I enjoy letting them do my make up and all this other stuff and I’ve always been more comfortable making female friends than male and I find them more relatable. Every now and then I secretly research info on sex change operations and I’ll watch videos about it and videos about feminine things. I have also had sexual intercourse with men and every time I always feel like something is missing. I guess my underlying question about all of this is how do I know whether or not I’m just curious or if I actually am trans. Any help and feedback would be appreciated.
     
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  2. Hawk

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    If you're not already, and you're in a safe place, try experimenting with how you want to be perceived. If you think you would be happier as a woman, try slowly integrating some feminine things into your day-to-day life (whether you paint your nails, buy some feminine undergarments, grow your hair out, etc.) I wouldn't recommend jumping into anything, but to rather take your time and see how things feel.
    Do you feel like this is you? Or does it feel foreign?
     
  3. ML1OO7

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    So I’ve tried out some of the things you’ve said to (such as adding more feminine things to my day to day life and experimenting with how I wish to be perceived) and I really do enjoy it and feel like safe in a way I’m not sure how to explain. I guess my next question would be like where do I go from here.
     
  4. Hawk

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    Do you know if any of your friends are LGBT supporters? If they are, you could ask them to call you by female pronouns and name (if you have one chosen). If you're not ready to take that step, and you think you can pass as female decently well, you could always experiment in a safe space (University campus, Pride Centre, etc) and see how it feels to be perceived as female. You could always accentuate your features to look more feminine with make-up as well if you can.

    Remember to stay safe, and don't do anything that would put yourself in any kind of danger.
     
  5. Hawk

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    Also, to add. If you think you're a trans woman. I'd look into therapists who specialize in gender identity and LGBT people. There's also quite a few online counselors if you're unable to seek face-to-face support with a professional during this crisis. Some therapists, may also give patients the option of online sessions. You'll just have to see who offers what, and who you think will meet your needs.
     
  6. ML1OO7

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    I only have a couple LBGT supporter friends and I don’t want to talk to them about this just yet because I’m still not 100% sure. I will be looking into a therapists that specializes in this however. Thank you for all your help!