Please help. Urgent. In love with my straight best friend

I'm sure you did love it, but joke or not this does not excuse his behavior or your passivity in this situation.

 

Cuddling is certainly something many very close friends who have no sexual interest in each other do.

That said, telling him may result in him coming out to the OP and that would likely have a positive result for both of them.

Or at least the relief of not having to hide a part of yourself from him would make the OP have someone he can confide in, trust, and feel safe with. It would also probably result in his friend being much more clear about his boundaries to not send the wrong signal.

 

Whether or not cuddling is normal between two friends, this is not a normal friendship. My hunch is that the friend knows the OP is in love with him and enjoys the attention, or is in love with him too and is too scared to admit it. Either way, the friend seems perfectly fine with the situation as is, while the OP is not, so it's on the OP to take the necessary steps to change his circumstances.

 

Of course you love him as a friend. This is not going to be easy at all. I was only suggesting this because you can’t be honest with him about your feelings.

I know you are against it but you could say because you guys have been so close lately, you are having some complex feelings. You don’t know what they are yet (even though you do). I’ve been there and I feel you are developing hope that he has possibly similar feelings. This way he may be honest with how he feels which could help you get over him.

 

As others have already said, your current relationship with him is not healthy for you. You need closure to move on. Otherwise, you could stay in this situation for months, even years, missing opportunities to be in love with someone who can reciprocate your feelings, and endangering your mental, emotional, and physical health. You wrote that you needed days to recover after hearing about the girls he's hooked up. Imagine that in three years he gets engaged and marries some girl. Could you handle that, knowing that you sacrificed a good part of your life just to have him in your life even though your feelings weren't reciprocated? Don't do that to yourself. I know that you're fond of him and that having him around partially fulfills your emotional and physical needs for him, but unless he has the same feelings for you, you will never have with him what you want and deserve: love. Maybe when you meet someone else who can give that to you, your obsession with your friend will end. If you can be honest with him, that will give you the closure. If you can't, my advice is to distance yourself from him a bit, explore new things, meet new people, try new activities, etc.

I was in a similar position once and know what you're going through.