Parents not helping. Need someone to talk to.

Dude, that's disgusting of them. It's manipulative and emotionally abusive. You're not their damn daughter, they don't have a daughter in you they have a son and nothing they think changes that. Have you provided them with information about what transgender actually means and stuff about gender dysphoria and how it's an medical condition, maybe when they see some facts they'll try to understand more? Let's see how bloody stupid they look when you go round to visit in a few years time and they're still calling you their 'daughter' when you're dench with a bunch of facial hair. Don't get stressed, feel embarrassed for them, they're the ones looking like idiots. It does anger me though that they think it's okay to treat you this way. Hang in there mate, hopefully they'll come around and if not, you don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

 

Maybe they need more time to get used to the changes that you have undergone. In time they will understand it, you need more patience.

 

It's an unfortunate and frustrating thing to have parents who don't recognize their trans kid. I've been there. But it isn't any fault of yours, and you don't deserve to be disrespected in that way. But as it happens, this is something you are going to have to work through.

It takes families a lot of time to come around. Sometimes years. A transguy I know, who is now in his thirties and transitioned when my age, told me it took his parents nearly a decade to come around and fully understand. All the years they knew you as a kid and during which time they had formed so many dreams for their "daughter" that they missed seeing the real you. If anyone should be supportive, it should be our parents. But they aren't, and you have spoken to them and still no change.

You've done everything you can right now, brother. Hold your head high. One day they will see what an amazing son they have and regret the times they missed you.

 

Hang in there. Just stay strong.

 

I might sound insensitive, but if you don't want to be around your parents you could always just leave. Go be with a close friend, relative, or someone who accepts you for who you are. Don't lose faith in them, it takes time to adjust.

 

Well, I am just gonna say it...your parents are assholes. I am SO sorry that you have to deal with this and put up with it. There is no excuse for your parents treating you like this. If you have corrected them and they STILL do this, then they are not respecting you. Is there somewhere else you can stay? I would seriously consider it and tell them why you are leaving. Let them know that as long as they do this you will not be visiting them nor spending time with them. Then follow up with it by leaving and not visiting until they make an actual effort to respect who you are. If you don't do anything to get across they are killing your soul every time they do that, it won't change. Sometimes you have to throw down the gauntlet.

My Partner is transmasculine/Nonbinary and I am afraid that is where we will be soon enough as well. Top surgery is set for Summer and the parents don't know yet. So we will visit them after the surgery so this should be interesting....

 

Sorry man I'm still learning the site.

 

Try now...sorry. I hope it worked.

 

Shoot me a message on my wall

 

Parents mean well and they have trouble letting go of how things are. It's like when kids grow up. I think what they really mean is you will always be their little one, their baby, and it's hard for them to unsee that.

I'm wearing a mask as much as you are. Even around the people who know I am trans. I will always be my brother's sister, my father's daughter, my mother's little girl.

But someday, I will also be a lucky woman's husband. And I won't need to explain myself or come out any more. Not as long as she knows and understands and respects who I identify as.

I still get dysphoric. I still hurt. But I don't bother trying to shape my face or body any more. I don't try to pass. It only hurts me further when I do those things, it doesn't work for me. But what I'm saying is, as long as you know the truth, that's all that really should matter. We know your truth and you know your truth and if you are spiritual, then the universe knows your truth. It knows that gender isn't something that nations should be fighting over and passing laws about. It knows that it's ridiculous in the grand scheme of things. Heck. Snails have both genders and they're not an abomination, and yet we can't wrap our heads around transgender people.