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One Year Anniversary Coming Out

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Dionysios, Dec 1, 2019.

  1. Dionysios

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    It was exactly one year ago today that I came out. After being married for 31 years, I never imagined that I would have to courage to make that step. But after much thought and reflection I finally sat my wife down and told her about my same sex attractions. Within two weeks I admitted that I was gay. My wife, hurt and angry, said that our marriage was over. We met with a divorce attorney and worked out a legal separation. We sold our home, split our assets and I moved out to a rental home in April.

    As part of coming out, I had to leave the priesthood. I lost many friends and acquaintances as I began to forge a new life for myself. I am grateful to the good friends I met at EC, who helped me through this difficult and trying time.

    I now live as an openly gay man. I am so happy, content and fulfilled. I own my own home near the museum I work with. I have made many new gay friends and attend LGBT events. My son and family support me. Most importantly, I have my wonderful boyfriend, who I have been dating for the past six months. He has been a tremendous source of support and affection during this time. I love my new life and feel so lucky to finally live the life I could only dream about.

    I never regretted coming out. For those going through the process of coming out, especially older, married men like myself, the outcome is worth it. There is sunshine and a rainbow at the end of this process. Persevere and do not lose faith. Your life at the end if this will be better, happier and more authentic!
     
  2. Jakebusman

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    My anniversary is New Years Eve
     
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  3. DecentOne

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    Hey, good to hear this update.
     
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  4. Nickw

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    Hey

    Congrats!
     
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  5. Wendyo23

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    Congratulations.
     
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  6. JToivonen

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    It's wonderful to read all that, @Dionysios ! It's really inspiring and encouraging!

    I myself am going through the exact same process of both separating and coming out. It's painful, filled with guilt, a sense of failure and shame, anguish, anxiety, second guessing and fear. But when I read that you managed to overcome all this and that you're happy now, it gives me the push I need!

    So glad for you! Hopefully I'll soon be where you are now!
     
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  7. cjmiller

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    Congrats and thanks for such an inspiring story.
     
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  8. Contented

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    Great positive story with a continuing happy ending(s). Congrats. We need more of these.
     
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  9. Jakebusman

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    Year sure flys fast
     
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  10. Dionysios

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    It is amazing how much one's life can change in only a year.
     
  11. Jakebusman

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    Ya so much has changed for me
     
  12. Rade

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    Congratulations my dear friend, wow that year has flown past quick!!
    My second year of being out gay begins next February. It's weird that after nearly two years, being openly gay, it's just become the new normal. I now don't think twice about telling people I'm gay, I no longer care and I mean that in the most positive light. I'm very naughty, Seeing two guys now and then at the moment. So I'm definitely not on Santa's list this year!! But I've come to realise after 20 yrs with the ex nagging, controlling wife that for now I'm enjoying my freedom of not having to be committed to anyone, I was previously faithful for 20 years. So I'm enjoying my sexual freedom. I go regularly for STI checks and don't have any shame. I'm absolutely loving my authentic life!
    Well done everyone we certainly have all come a long way.
    Jon x x x
     
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  13. quebec

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    Dionysios.....So, So happy for you!
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
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  14. Dionysios

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    Jon,
    My dear friend, your struggle last year coming out gave me untold hope and inspiration. Last December I was like a deer in the headlights after I came out. I was stunned and unsure of what the future held. Your incredible story in coming out, separating from your wife after many years of marriage and getting your own place and plunging into the dating scene gave me a blueprint of how to proceed. I will always be grateful to you for sharing your own struggle and insight into the LGBT world.

    You are a great guy and deserve to be yourself. I am glad to hear that you are doing a bit of exploration and living an authentic life. You will never be on the "naughty list" as far as I'm concerned. My bf and I are exploring too and may do a three some again. *smile* I am proud to be living a gay life and don't worry about others may say. To mark my one year anniversary I hoisted my rainbow flag, which now flutters in front of my house and it's Christmas decorations.

    I really hope that the coming year will be an awesome and great one for you!

    DennisXXX
     
  15. 1cgd

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    I’m at just about 11 months (my anniversary date is Jan. 5) and I agree. What a difference! OP and I have stories that are quite similar.

    His point about being yourself and living life as the true you is by far the most important takeaway for those in the position we were a year ago.
     
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  16. Contented

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    Coming out totally and finally living as an openly gay man has been by far been the best experience of my life outside of the birth of my daughter. To live without shame, guilt, remorse or excuse as been and continues to be exhilarating. To be free of the compulsory heterosexuality that truly hampered my happiness is a gift. I know without a shadow of a doubt I don’t need a woman to live a complete life, all along for me the answer was a man. Waking up next to my BF every day in a loving honest relationship is better than anything I could have imagined a few years ago. I have indeed changed, I am proudly a happy, openly gay man who doesn’t care what anyone else thinks. I need make no excuses for what I was and who I am now. My homosexuality has evolved from the shadows of the closet both real and imagined.
     
  17. Rade

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    Sending you the biggest hugs always.......x x x....your journey is incredible too, to break free after 31 years marriage was very brave and I'm very proud of you. Let's hope we continue to inspire other men on EC.
    Hugs to everyone here
    Jon x x
     
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  18. Rade

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    Be inspired
    Be openly gay
    Complete freedom
    No guilt
    Be happy
    Live authentic and true to who we are
    New confidence
    We learn to own our sexuality finally
    Be ourselves the words authentic
     
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  19. Unsure77

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    Sunday was my gayversary as well. Although, I’m not remotely as far along in the dating process as you. Congrats, man! It’s awesome seeing you so happy. What a difference a year can make!
     
  20. Dionysios

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    So happy for you my friend! Last year I was not sure if I would find love or not when I came out. But just to finally live openly as a gay man would be worth it. I was so tired and stifled living a fake, heterosexual life.

    However after I finally emerged from the closet, as icing on the cake, I met an amazing and awesome guy. I am humbled and delighted to have him as my boyfriend. He had been looking for years, but had dated guys who were all in the closet. We are very happy together. Not a day goes by that we don't call each other. We've arranged our schedules so that we see each other every weekend.

    I can only hope that you find that special someone to complete your new life!
     
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