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Ok think of planning a trip to the states to visit the girl i like (LDR)

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Tigermud, Apr 24, 2019.

  1. Tigermud

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    Ive made same other posts about this.

    Im talking to a girl who lives very far from me.

    I live in the uk and i want to visit the states to meet her.

    My best idea is i could get an all inclusive holiday and invite her to come and stay with me in the time im down and we can spend some time together.
     
  2. Love4Ever

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    If this is something you can swing I would definitely say yes you should do it! I would happily do the same if logistically I could make it happen. As long as everything feels right and you want to I think you should.
     
  3. Groosenator

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    Not quite as far but this is how I ended up with my wife. We were close long distance and one day I flew out to stay with her for a while (her family wouldn't let her go meet some internet stranger in another country lol). Fast forward a couple years and I flew 2500 miles (4000km) to live in Buffalo, NY by the Canadian border to live close to her. We've been married over 2 years now and have no regrets about getting together at all.

    I think the long distance is not an issue, the question is compatibility and frequent communication. Before I moved closer, I video called with her Every Single Day. We just wanted to spend as much time together as we could. By the time I moved in with her, there were very few surprises about what she would be like in person rather than over call or text. There will always be unexpected things and the less you know about her the more you need to be prepared for her to be not quite what you expect. I've met up with many internet friends who are very different in person than they are over the internet.

    If you have never met in person, go into this with an open mind. Expect that she might not be what you expected. Maybe she will and if she is that's great! But be ready for anything. I don't even just mean safety issues, though it's always good to be careful with that too. I've met people in person and found that they grated on my nerves without the barrier of the internet where I can take a break and walk away now and then.

    If you are serious about this girl, and you go through with this, try to seriously look for nuances that might bother you in the future. Something that bothers you now but you can ignore might not be so easy to ignore if you were living together for a year. I don't mean to sound like I am trying to dissuade you, but I think long distance relationships DO have unique challenges and need to be approached differently than local relationships.

    Be careful, be prepared, don't let your excitement cloud your judgement. But as long as you are being pragmatic and thorough, it's a great idea! Best of luck and I hope if you go through it that she is everything you hope!
     
  4. Love4Ever

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    This is great advice.