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Not sure what to think

Discussion in 'The Welcome Lounge' started by Janeyitimbbi, Jun 7, 2022.

  1. Janeyitimbbi

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    I am a woman in my mid 40’s and just recently starting to get attracted to women. It all started when a friend kissed me out of the blue. Much to my astonishment I did not pull away and kissed her back quite passionately. I am so confused I have only ever been with men and never kissed a woman before in my life or had feelings about women this way. I am so infatuated with this woman right now and very confused why after just a kiss I cant stop thinking about her.
     
  2. Stitch57

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  3. quebec

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    Janeyitimbbi.....Hello and a great big LGBTQIA+ welcome to Empty Closets! :old_smile: I can remember the first post that I made on EC. I was desperate for help and I got the help that night that I so needed. I hope that we can help you in the same way that I received help. The most important thing to remember about Empty Closets is that we do care about you! We're very glad that you found us here on EC and hope that we can answer questions, give you support and provide a place to vent (as long as it's not violent!) :old_big_grin: when that becomes necessary!

    *****There are 18 different sub-forums here that you can check out and join in the conversations or start your own thread/conversation. In particular you may want to check out the forums that are titled "Sexual Orientation” and "LGBT Later in Life" there are a lot of people there who have dealt with some of the same kind of issues that could be challenging you.
    When you have made at least 10 posts on various threads you will be able to post messages on a member's Profile Page. Just click on a member's Avatar Picture and then click on "Profile Page" in the dialogue box that pops up. You'll then be on their Profile Page and there will be a box that says: "Write Something" When you have been on EC for a few weeks and have made at least 50 posts on various forums, you can apply for Full Membership. A Full Member can send Private Messages (PM) to other Full Members and share personal contact info. Right now you can only send a PM to a Staff Member as that is always possible. Here is a quote from the Full Membership information forum: :old_cool:

    *****To be eligible you must be a member of Empty Closets for a minimum of two weeks, and have a minimum of 50 posts. These posts must be across numerous forums (Fun & Games does not contribute to post count), and consistently posted across a minimum of two weeks. You wouldn't be eligible, for example, if you registered, had no activity for two weeks, and then returned to post 50 times on your 14th day of membership.

    *****Well, as I said, we're very glad you found us! :old_rolleyes: If you have any questions at all, you can post a question on my Profile Page or send me a Private Message.

    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
    #3 quebec, Jun 7, 2022
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2022
  4. bambibat

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    Welcome! I think human attraction is a weird/interesting thing. Some people don’t realise they’re attracted to the same sex for years until something ignites it. And the way most of us grow up and are lead to view straight relationships as the default, makes it difficult for some to notice potential same-sex attraction. Or some people just lean very heavily one way (whether it’s towards the opposite sex or same sex), which makes it harder to figure things out. It’s sounds possible you are on the bisexual spectrum and are just now realising it. The kiss clearly had a big impact.

    I know this forum has helped me quite a bit and I hope you find it useful as well! Everyone is so supportive here
     
  5. resu

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    What you describe is very common because many LGBT+ people are raised in environments where heterosexuality is the norm ("heteronormativity"). While it is pretty old, I think this is where the Kinsey scale of sexuality might help you decide what fits best for you.
     
  6. silverhalo

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    Hey welcome to EC, I can totally understand that suddenly feeling like you have developed attraction to the same sex in your 40's can seem confusing and scary but its not as uncommon as you think. What is your current relationship status are you single?
     
  7. Pearls1984

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    Hi there. I can understand why that would be confusing. I don't have much advice to offer as I am just now starting to accept my own same-sex attraction, but I can definitely support you on your journey.