First off, I think that labels should just be used to inform people rather than define or limit ourselves or others. That said, I am not sure which label to use. For the past couple of years I have been saying that I am somewhere on the asexual spectrum. Mostly this was to let people know that I was not available sexually. In the past I have called myself a lesbian mainly it was to try to get men from hitting on me. I have had far less problems with women aggressively pursuing me. I have had sex in the past and if we were required to label ourselves by our past activities then I would be pansexual but my libido has seemed lower than the partners that I have had. An issue that I have had is that while I definitely want intimacy and close physical contact, I don't want sex unless it is within a strong meaningful relationship. So far in my life, every relationship that I have had has been with someone who was just using me or even abusive. This has led me to withhold the possibility of sex because I am tired of being used. What I really want is cuddling and intimacy but I cannot figure out how to find that. So many people that I have met were only interested in sex and would lie to get it, promising me the cuddling and intimacy that I am looking for and then not delivering after getting what THEY wanted. I am not certain that I have stayed on subject, I hope that this makes sense.