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Not a good time?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by XefrAce, Dec 27, 2017.

  1. XefrAce

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Alternia
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I really want to come out to my parents that i'm trans, but the problem is i'm on winter break from college right now, and i'm going back to college in several weeks, so i feel like i should hold off until i'm back for the summer since i don't think anything can really be done in such a small window. I just feel like with everything else going on that coming out would just put extra stress on my parents. At the same time i want to tell them so that they know.

    I've also been low key debating coming out as ace as well, but i think that would be way too much to do all at once. Then again coming out as ace would probably be easier since that doesn't involve any pronoun changes...
     
  2. jam93

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I don't know you or your parents. I don't know how close you are, or what thier views on these things are. So it might be best to take this as an opinion or suggestion more than actual advice. But I almost think it might be better to come out as trans now now. If you do that then your parents will have more time to process what you tell them before they really need to deal with it. They will have the semester to get used to the idea of the person they've thought of as thier daughter for years being thier son instead. That's going to take some ajusting, and it may be easier, for both of you, if they have some space. I wouldn't recommend leaving them alone, mind, make sure to make it clear that you are there to answer thier questions and help them understand what's happening. It might be good, for example, to try and cone back every few weekends if it's not to far of a commute, or at the very least call them from time to time to check up on them. Again this is just my thoughts on this, and what I would probably have done in your situation. Also, if you tell them now, it could make it possible to start getting whatever medical appointments you need to start transitioning (sorry, I'm not trans so I don't really know what that involves) lined up for early in the summer, so that you can start doing that as soon as possible when you get back.
    As for the ace thing, it might not be as easy as you think. I have a friend that recently came out to her mom as ace and biromantic. She said her mom took the news that she was into girls better then the news that she was Ace. Again, I don't know your parents, and telling your parents your thier son not thier daughter is probably a bigger revilation then my friend telling her mom she likes girls, but it's still something to consider.
    Anyway good luck, I hope things work out whatever you decide to do.
     
  3. XefrAce

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Male (trans*)
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    Out Status:
    A few people
    Those are some good points. I would like to start transitioning as soon as i can. Also, the ace thing might not be too much of a surprise once i describe it since my parents are well aware of my lack of romantic endeavors.