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Narrow interests

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Kwekie, Jun 3, 2020.

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  1. Kwekie

    Kwekie
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    Throughout my life, I think its pretty easy to say that almost every women who isnt obese and below x age [35? 40? i dont know] is attractive. When I was teenager and all that I was horny as hell and I thought attractive person = im attracted to them. That the desire for sex and that person was the same as desire for sex with that person. After a while i realized i didnt really find women erotic per se, and what i really longed for were guys. Girls were always present on my mind because so many of them are attractive and i had a high libido, but it didnt feel right, and the guys im interested in are so damn selective. Few. I go on ####### and its just a bunch of men i would never have interest in, and then suddenly like lightning theres THAT guy. i dont have many celebrity crushes on men, im not checking out men a ton if im outside and walking around, i do that more for women. I will check out guys if they meet my criterion of interest, which, to be honest, i dont fully understand. i like masculine guys, short feminine guys, its all over the place. But one thing is certain is that most guys im not interested in. And most girls I find completely attractive and sexual, I just dont really care. Its like looking at a really pretty flower or a painting, but one wearing whorish clothing. Pleasant, and topically sexual, but it does nothing.

    Its frustrating. I went on a date the other day with a guy id been texting for a month. I thought there was something there-- he said there wasnt. damn. I have so few people im interested in, that that alone makes me feel inauthentic or broken. How common is it to be picky? So many gay guys i know or have met are just unremittant whores that like every passably attractive guy. I'm not like that at all.
     
    #1 Kwekie, Jun 3, 2020
    Last edited: Jun 3, 2020
  2. Adz6

    Adz6
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    Hi kwekie,
    Your story is very familiar to mine.
    I also find all women, big, small or whatever very attractive I’m for ever looking at woman and being distracted by their beauty and dare I say their femininity. Though, For the last 20 years or so I’ve never had that lust to be with them in a sexual way, in fact there is no sexual desire form my part at all, I just enjoy looking and observing women. I like the look of women but not in the sexual way.
    When it comes to men, I don’t look at men at all unless he is my type, (fit lean swimmers body). When I see him I can’t take my eyes off him and those wonderful thoughts run Through my head, it is like I’m a teenager again it is wonderful when it happens.
    For me I’m very picky in what turns me on, the way I look at it is that the way I’m wired and I may as well enjoy it
     
    #2 Adz6, Jun 3, 2020
  3. amarot

    amarot
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    Personally, you don't sound gay to me. You sound like you're bisexual who is more attracted to women, but maybe your attraction to men is more on the passionate/romantic side which might make it seem stronger.

    As a gay man, I don't relate to your experiences. The fact that women take more care of their appearance than men has never affected my sexuality. In fact, I've always thought it was hot that men are more "natural" than women, since men tend to alter our appearances less lol (many women actually look average/ugly without makeup products). When I see a beautiful woman, I feel indifferent. Maybe I'll think to myself "oh, she's pretty!" but then a few seconds later I'll move on to something else. Even when I was an extremely horny teenager, I never found women attractive or fantasized about them. I was always drawn to men and masculine beauty.

    You might find yourself more aesthetically attracted to women in general, but maybe some aspects of them are not appealing (like emotionally, personality-wise, etc). And maybe you're less aesthetically attracted to men, but the types of men you're into might trigger a stronger emotional response in you and you see yourself craving them more than women.
     
    #3 amarot, Feb 7, 2022
  4. LostInDaydreams

    LostInDaydreams
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    Hi @amarot and welcome to EC,

    As this is an old thread, I have locked it, but you are very welcome join in more recent discussions or even start your own thread.

    I hope you enjoy being part of the EC community. :slight_smile:
     
    #4 LostInDaydreams, Feb 7, 2022
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