i did give them that letter, and then i went down to see them. they both gave me a big hug first, and i was crying again (lol). then they just said, right off, "just be yourself" "we want you to be happy" etc. and my mum even said that she wasn't entirely suprised, as i'd been dropping quite a few hints lately. my dad was totally suprised, hehe, but he was equally good about it!! they were just so good, i could hardly have imagined a better response. :icon_bigg we then talked about it for quite a long time. i cried a bit more but mostly it was just because i was trying to explain to them some of the things that have been in my head all these years, which is quite painful. (!) thank you to everyone here who has helped me think things through; without understanding things in my head a bit better, i could never have got up the courage to tell them. it's not the end of the road of acceptance now, by any means, but at least i feel now like i'm not lying to them anymore, and even that they might be able to help me work through it a bit. :lol: all praise my parents!!