I have a crush on a girl during our one-month project. Early on, she really cared about me and messaged me to ask questions. I oftentimes gave heart emoticons to her comments on our work platform. She then messaged me, hinting that we could maintain this relationship by messaging her on Whatsapp or Facebook. I sent her some pickup lines: "If you are Whatsapp and I am Facebook, how much would I have to pay for an acquisition?". She reacted hahaha to this, which made me feel so confused about her intentions. After that day, I felt that she was a bit nervous and took a day off work (I think she tried to avoid me?). And then I messaged her back on Whatsapp to ask her about her daily life and stuff. Her responses were very positive, and in fact she thanked me for checking in again. After that, I put on an act, not liking her comments or answering any questions she posted on our work platform (before this, I did this to make her feel special) to see what her reaction would be. Surprisingly, she messaged me to ask if anything was okay with me. After this, I really developed my feelings for her. I decided to confess my feelings to her and asked her if she would like to be my girlfriend. This is when I suffered from the most painful heartbreak in my life. She said that she started to feel uncomfortable and told me that she was straight. One day after, she was offline from our work platform for an entire day and avoided seeing me or responding to me in our group meetings. The most painful thing was I realised she blocked me on every social media including Whatsapp and Facebook (I never used Facebook to contact her). My question is: Is it the fact that she was not brave enough to confess to herself she had feelings for a same-sex person that made her block me to forget about me for good even though she liked me?
The "haha" could be a nervous response. People can be nice and not be interested romantically. This isn't the answer you want to hear, but most likely, she's straight and is creeped out. Let it go.
I'm sorry to say that she's probably not interested. It sounds like she was trying to maintain a good working relationship and maybe even a friendship but that's it.
Ultimately, you have to take her word about being straight and not interested. Sometimes the friendliness of straight people can seem like mixed messages, especially if they didn't realize you were bi. Sometimes helps to first come out before revealing romantic feelings.
If she wanted to maintain this relationship, why did she block me on everything? Did she test me to see if I would chase after her?
Does it make sense that she said she was straight because she was not ready to identify herself as bisexual but still had feelings for me, hence blocking me to forget everything? Did she test me to see my reactions to her rejection? I'm so confused about her intentions.
No, I think she was trying to maintain your friendship BEFORE you asked her to be your girlfriend. After you asked, I believe she was probably a bit freaked out and that's why she blocked you on everything. For what it's worth, I don't think you should chase after her. I don't think that's what she wants or what's best for your working relationship. I'm sorry.
No. That makes no sense whatsoever. No, she likely blocked you because you are being creepy and not getting the message. Let. This. Go. She. Is. Not. Interested. Continued effort might land you a restraining order.
Hello, thecather, I know this is very painful for you, rejection sucks. That being said, haven't you ever had friends that you love very much but could not see yourself with romantically? It sounds like at most she was just trying to be friends with you. I also agree with everyone else she is straight. It's sometimes very difficult to tells people's intentions if you do not know their orientation, especially if your attraction to them is sort of clouding things. I am sorry you're hurting though. One last piece of advice. Please, understand I am not making fun of you I'm just trying to help. For me, if a guy asked me to be his boyfriend and we'd never even been on a date I would not know how to respond even though I'm gay and even if I found him attractive. In the future, try asking someone out for coffee or to get dinner first before you pop the girlfriend question. Get to know the person well outside of work or school first.
No one is a mind reader. We have to accept what people say/do rather than guessing at intentions. Don’t let this girl who blocked you put blinders from looking for more compatible matches.
