1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

My Boyfriend Hits me.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Nirvana00, Jun 28, 2016.

  1. Nirvana00

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2016
    Messages:
    0
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Naples
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    I've been in a relationship for just about a year . My Boyfriend and me are like the adorable gay couple at my school and everyone thinks we are perfect. But no one actually knows that he hits me. I guess nothing about it really matters though, as long as nothing gets in the way of my school work. But I don't know how to resolve this problem, should I leave him?:dry:
     
  2. greatwhale

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2013
    Messages:
    6,581
    Likes Received:
    409
    Location:
    Montreal
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Yes.

    There is no excuse, reason, justification or anything else that says you need to endure being hit.

    Leave, and leave now.
     
  3. csm123

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2009
    Messages:
    272
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lincs(UK)
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Walk away,it will only get worse.
     
  4. Nickw

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2016
    Messages:
    2,164
    Likes Received:
    1,144
    Location:
    Out West
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Listen to Greatwhale please.

    This will never stop. It will get worse and it can destroy you. Really. If you need to tell somebody to be sheltered please do it.
     
  5. killswitch0029

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2015
    Messages:
    1,084
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    New England
    Yes. There's absolutely no reason anyone should hit their significant other and hitting can slowly evolve into more serious and dangerous behavior.
     
  6. mirkku

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 13, 2016
    Messages:
    135
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Finland
    Gender:
    Female
    Oh, dear... Please walk away, immediately.
     
  7. peterw78165

    peterw78165 Guest

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2015
    Messages:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Oregon
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    You need to get out of this relationship. Now.
     
  8. bubbles123

    bubbles123 Guest

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2015
    Messages:
    934
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    New England, US
    I know there are probably many reasons you want to stay in the relationship, but please, please listen to our advice. This is not healthy for you, even if that's hard to see because you like being in the relationship.
    A relationship is something that should be all-around good and positive. Yes, there may be communication challenges sometimes, but this is not like that. The way he is acting is not justifyable and not healthy for you. This isn't a challenge/flaw to just deal with. This is serious. Even if you can't see it as a real threat now, please know that it is. It will only get worse, and regardless, it is not healthy for you physically or emotionally. You do not deserve that treatment, and you don't need to settle for it.

    A relationship may seem like a good thing to have now, and he may seem like a good person in other ways, but that doesn't change the fact that this is not something you should be involved with. You will thank yourself, I promise you, if you end this because you deserve no less. It is never to late to make things better and do what you need to.

    My best wishes and thoughts are with you. I know you won't take this lightly, yet I know how easy it is to let denial and wishful thinking make you blind to what's best and what needs to happen. Breaking up is temporary, but it's better than staying in a relationship that brings you undue harm, I promise.

    Best of luck. Please do what is right for your own well-being<3
     
  9. SillyGoose

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 16, 2016
    Messages:
    501
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Crumpet Land
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    Don't stay or get counselling
     
  10. Randy

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2012
    Messages:
    3,778
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Texas
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Leave. Now. Don't look back.
     
  11. alittlemore

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2016
    Messages:
    29
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Newcastle-upon-Tyne, UK
    Please leave. You do not deserve this. Good luck. (*hug*)
     
  12. Gravity

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Nov 1, 2011
    Messages:
    321
    Likes Received:
    256
    Location:
    United States
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    You should leave him. Obviously I'm not the first to say so, but it bears repeating.

    The only thing I'll add is that as long as you are in this relationship, both your physical and emotional well-being are in danger. This behavior is going to affect other areas of your life, including financial issues and your work in school, if it hasn't already. The chances of you being seriously hurt or even killed are very real, as well.

    If you need to talk in detail about this, please contact staff, but in any case I do hope you take everyone's advice here.
     
  13. MrHojalata98

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2012
    Messages:
    91
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Texas
    Please leave. Just look at the wave of people telling you that you deserve better. And it's all true, you deserve so much more than what he's offering. There is no boy in the world, no amount of brains, or good looks, or charm, that are worth your physical or emotional safety and comfort. Your partner is suppose to make you feel safe, not threatened. please please don't stay with him.
     
  14. resu

    Advisor Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2013
    Messages:
    4,799
    Likes Received:
    233
    Location:
    Oklahoma City
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    How old are you?

    You posted this thread for a reason. For many people, they would have already left by now, but unfortunately you have gotten used to this abuser to the point you have to ask for help with the decision. Being in an abusive relationship is worse than being single and maybe lonely. It will take time to heal, but your life is really in your control, not your abuser's. He is not a boyfriend; he is a monster.

    You should develop a plan to leave, and you should ask for help, both here and any friends/family who you can count on for support.
     
  15. RavenTheRat

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    May 27, 2015
    Messages:
    516
    Likes Received:
    29
    Location:
    North Carolina
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    All but family
    Leave him immediatley. Hitting is never acceptable. Ever. EVER. And also make sure you talk to a parent or other adult about him and what's going on, in order to keep yourself safe once you do.

    Best of luck hun, I hope all goes well <3
     
  16. Daydreamer1

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2011
    Messages:
    5,680
    Likes Received:
    20
    Location:
    Pennsylvania
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Abuse, in any form, is never okay. You don't deserve to put up with anyone who puts their hands on you. If you're able to, leave that person while you can. If you feel like you might be in danger, please reach out to someone like a close friend or a relative that you can trust---especially if you're a minor.

    Please stay safe, okay?
     
  17. SpaceOddity

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2016
    Messages:
    134
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Ontario, Canada
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    As everyone is saying above, abuse is never okay.

    I was hit repeatedly in the face during a fight with my ex during a night and it only took one time. I had him arrested and I walked away and never looked back. Best thing I ever did. Do that too. Leave now and don't look back.
     
  18. Kayle

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2016
    Messages:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Tel Aviv
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Leave him !
    Nothing in this world justifies you being hit by him,nothing ! you deserve better,a lot better.
     
  19. BryanM

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2013
    Messages:
    2,894
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Columbia, Missouri
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Yes, leave him. Leave him and don't look back! Nobody has the right to hurt you, especially someone who claims to love you. If you feel comfortable doing so, you may also want to talk to your school counselor about this as well, and perhaps the Italian equivalent to a Title IX office if there is one.
     
  20. AmyBee

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2016
    Messages:
    511
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Japan
    No one should be hitting you. Leave him.