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"Mostly gay" and open mindedness

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Bono1995, Apr 15, 2019 at 5:23 AM.

  1. Bono1995

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    Hey everyone,

    I am 23 years old and when I was 15 I knew I am attracted to men (around the year 2010). At my high school I didn't had the guts to come out because of the widespread homophobia and heteronormaitivity. When I went to (more tolerant, progressive and inclusive) university in 2015 I made new gay friends and came out as gay. I started dating guys and having sex with them.

    However, the last years I noticed that I am getting more interested in women. I can get sexually aroused of some girls when they are not naked and are wearing nice/elegant clothes. I started looking for straight porn, and went to CFNM (clothed female, naked male) porn and jerked off to it. I have (developed) a fetish for cleavages and women wearing bikinis or elegant dresses. I am gay, but this side of my sexuality got more prominent the last two years or so.

    Could this be a relict of years of heteronormativity in my puberty or is it sexual confusion? Does anyone recognize this?

    Greetings
     
  2. DecentOne

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    Welcome to Empty Closets!

    I went to the article you linked in your other post in the Welcome forum. I had to run it through a translator, but was able to understand it.

    What I’ve learned in life is that people are complex. There is a whole range of ways people are attracted to others. The Chit Chat section here had a (for entertainment purposes) test to take online, where the results come out on a grid. Nobody had the same results, and lots of folks ended up having a mix of heterosexual and homosexual, even if they considered themselves gay.
    https://forum.emptyclosets.com/index.php?threads/idr-labs-sexual-orientation-test.478540/
    And there is the older Kinsey test from 1948, which shows a range from 0-6 from “straight” to “gay” and in between.

    If it bothers you or feels confusing you could talk with a counselor or therapist, not to change anything but just to gain acceptance that you are who you are and that includes some attractions regardless of gender. Don’t let other people’s opinions define you, just enjoy being you!
     
  3. Bono1995

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    Thanks, this post is quite helpful! And yes, sexuality and people are indeed complex :wink:.
     
  4. smurf

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    Its hard to say whether its internalized something or just something you find hot.

    If it doesn't bother you or stop you from having fulfilling relationships then I wouldn't sweat it. Just at thing you are into.

    I know tons of gay guys who are into straight porn, but wouldn't sleep with a woman. I know some straight women who have fallen in love with only one girl and nothing else. Its more common than you might think.

    Enjoy it for what it is :slight_smile: