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Married, kids, bisexual, depressed

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Jggates, Aug 1, 2018.

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  1. Jggates

    Jggates
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    I'm asking myself the same question.
     
    #221 Jggates, Oct 30, 2018
  2. Rade

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    Thanks, I'm sorry I dumped that previous post on you, I'm sure you have your own stuff going on. I felt bad when I re read it . It's been a bad couple of days but tonight I'm feeling more positive. The letting agency say they have all info and it should now progress . I'm thinking how I want the apartment to look. And playing some music has lifted my mood.
    Thanks for your kindness Rade
     
    #222 Rade, Oct 30, 2018
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  3. Jggates

    Jggates
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    @Rade Don't feel bad about offloading on here. I started this thread in a pit of depression with a post that wasn't exactly cheery - and I've found that getting things off my chest has helped to some degree (not least by finding out that I wasn't alone).

    Putting on a brave face and pretending everything is fine is exactly what got us into our situations. So please don't try to put on an artificial smile here - be honest, and unburden.
     
    #223 Jggates, Oct 31, 2018
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  4. Jakebusman

    Jakebusman
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    Brave faces don't make things better
     
    #224 Jakebusman, Oct 31, 2018
    Last edited: Oct 31, 2018
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  5. Rade

    Rade
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    Well I normally don't have emotions but feel like crying. I have only cried twice in the last 18 yrs but I'm close to it now....but after I have cried in the past I have felt better.....
     
    #225 Rade, Oct 31, 2018
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  6. Jggates

    Jggates
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    Me too, I buried my emotions too but these past months I've done a lot of crying. But you are right, it does feel better afterwards.
     
    #226 Jggates, Nov 1, 2018
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  7. Rade

    Rade
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    I have counselling tomorrow, and after an incredible tough few days the crying might start ...
     
    #227 Rade, Nov 1, 2018
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  8. Hugh

    Hugh
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    Absolutely sums it up perfectly! For me, coming out to anyone I know we'll was never an option so I've had at least 10 years of uncertainty followed by 22 years in the closet. I only had serious relationships with women even though I'm not very attracted to them sexually and many short affairs and one night stands with men. I thought if I came out on line, word would filter through. But no. Thousands of people know I'm gay. Just not the right ones. The struggle remains
     
    #228 Hugh, Nov 2, 2018
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  9. Jakebusman

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    What should I do guys
     
    #229 Jakebusman, Nov 3, 2018
  10. Rade

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    It depends Jake what you want for your future. Coming out even just as bisexual may destroy your marriage.
    My life's in bits and I started to cry this morning due to severe stress and emotions. My ex is with a guy with addictions and he went missing for 15 hrs last night . I was supposed to have a break from the kids today but yet again have had to step up as a dad. .I'm totally exhausted
     
    #230 Rade, Nov 3, 2018
    Last edited: Nov 3, 2018
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  11. Jggates

    Jggates
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    #231 Jggates, Nov 3, 2018
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  12. Lgbtqpride

    Lgbtqpride
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    Love has no gender, just follow your heart.

    It is difficult to be in the closet,you are afraid that once you come out, you will lose everything.Just remember you are not alone.All lgbtq suffers the same fate.

    The first step is to make more lgbtq friends so you can feel better,only come out when you are ready,maybe come out a few years later, not now.
     
    #232 Lgbtqpride, Nov 3, 2018
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  13. Rade

    Rade
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    Thanks....he's been found, he took drugs....me and ex wife had a good talk and have called a truce......I went for a run this early evening and I'm feeling better now ...thank you X
     
    #233 Rade, Nov 3, 2018
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  14. Jakebusman

    Jakebusman
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    Gk
    Glad your better
     
    #234 Jakebusman, Nov 4, 2018
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  15. Jggates

    Jggates
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    Hello all. Just thought I'd check in and let you know how things are going.

    Had a rough week or so - felt like I was drowning again and began to sink. I don't know what triggered it but I did hit a real low.

    But the good news is I'm starting to rise again. Looking forward once more so I'm feeling more positive.

    Still don't see any way out of the hole, but I'm just focusing on the here & now for the time being.

    Hope you guys are doing well.
     
    #235 Jggates, Nov 7, 2018
    Last edited: Nov 7, 2018
  16. Hugh

    Hugh
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    Poor you! You will rise and life will be better than you could possibly imagine. It's like being in fog, isn't it? You know there is sunshine somewhere you just have to find your way to it. Be amazing, whatever you do!
    :kiss:
     
    #236 Hugh, Nov 7, 2018
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  17. Rade

    Rade
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    I think for some or most of us it's like a rollarcoaster, personally one day I feel ok, can manage and cope. Then the next I'm literally on the floor. It can be the same with emotions. Some days I'm ok and others I feel so sad, empty and want to cry...
    We're all on journrys, I'm signing the tenancy agreement on Friday, I feel daunted by the whole thing. Not lived alone for 20 yrs and leaving my 3 kids.....
    But I have to be positive, I will see them about 4 times a week and part of this is a sleep over. My ex wife and her boyfriend will help me move so I'm lucky......
    But it's hard on all of us involved. It's Christmas next month, normally I like it but seeing the decorations being put up in my town just depressed me.....
    I'm a survivor and will get through this. I'm visually impaired. When I worked for a sight loss charity we had a saying amaginst the staff people either become victims of their sight loss or survivors. Well I'm a survivor and we can apply this to most situations in life.
    So people be survivors and keep pushing forward with your lives....
    Love and respect Rade XXX
     
    #237 Rade, Nov 7, 2018
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  18. Hugh

    Hugh
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    A lovely response! Anyone can be a survivor with the right attitude and some support. And, these days, on line support is as good as any. Some of those I consider close friends and confidants, I have never actually met, which is weird.
     
    #238 Hugh, Nov 8, 2018
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  19. Jakebusman

    Jakebusman
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    Well the other day she flat out asked if I was Bisexual and I said no I feel like if I said yes she would not accept me I don't wanna lose 7 years of marriage I am so stressed and upset
     
    #239 Jakebusman, Nov 11, 2018
  20. Lgbtqpride

    Lgbtqpride
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    She should love the real you, if not, she does not deserve you.Do not live your life in regrets.It is better to come out than be in the closet.
     
    #240 Lgbtqpride, Nov 11, 2018
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