1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Married and also involved

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Stuck42, Aug 28, 2017.

Thread Tools

Thread Tools

Page 3 of 5
  1. Mabel

    Mabel
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2017
    Messages:
    186
    Likes Received:
    204
    Location:
    New England
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Sure a bit of irony. Really though, it's different when you are closeted. Not everybody has a situation where there can be honesty. There are still many places in the US that can be stifling to LGBTQ people and we all know the struggle. Honesty is ideal but not always possible. This other women has full disclosure and is exploiting that to someone who is just trying to understand herself, there is a difference.
     
    #41 Mabel, Aug 30, 2017
    Stuck42 likes this.
  2. Stuck42

    Stuck42
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2017
    Messages:
    50
    Likes Received:
    22
    Location:
    Midwest
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I do indeed see the irony...but this quote was taken out of context. I was responding to a question that someone asked as they are in a similar situation. I am not happy with what I have going on in my life. I don't want to hurt my husband, I love him..but I can't help how I feel about this girl. It's so physical and just magnetic when we are together. We touch an arm or even a finger JUST to be near each other. When we are together, it's fantastic..then we go back to the real world and I struggle. When I meant exclusive I meant we have our marriages and each other. Totally not ideal or possible..but what I dream of.
     
    #42 Stuck42, Aug 30, 2017
  3. Stuck42

    Stuck42
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2017
    Messages:
    50
    Likes Received:
    22
    Location:
    Midwest
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Thank you for understanding. I live in the Midwest...there is very little acceptance or possibilities where I live. I am not trying to hurt anyone..just my own heart
     
    #43 Stuck42, Aug 30, 2017
  4. Stuck42

    Stuck42
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2017
    Messages:
    50
    Likes Received:
    22
    Location:
    Midwest
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I stumbled upon this support site as a fluke...and I am so glad I did. I don't know who to talk to that understands!!!
     
    #44 Stuck42, Aug 30, 2017
    dreamingfreely and RJay like this.
  5. SiennaFire

    SiennaFire
    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 23, 2015
    Messages:
    2,161
    Likes Received:
    246
    Location:
    Boston
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I was closeted and made the jump to the other side. Please PM me to discuss further.
     
    #45 SiennaFire, Aug 30, 2017
    Last edited: Aug 30, 2017
  6. SiennaFire

    SiennaFire
    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 23, 2015
    Messages:
    2,161
    Likes Received:
    246
    Location:
    Boston
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I've been there - I understand what you are going through. I came out to my wife and divorced so I could feel the authentic love of another man.
     
    #46 SiennaFire, Aug 30, 2017
    Last edited: Aug 30, 2017
  7. RJay

    RJay
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2017
    Messages:
    932
    Likes Received:
    1,361
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Glad you are here now @Stuck42 ! It's a great place. You will get lots of compassion and good perspective. It's been invaluable to me.
     
    #47 RJay, Aug 30, 2017
    Stuck42 likes this.
  8. Mabel

    Mabel
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2017
    Messages:
    186
    Likes Received:
    204
    Location:
    New England
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I'm making that jump too. I am blessed though to have a supportive partner in a community that will for the most part accept this. I just know there are people out there that have it much tougher, I don't like to assume that they are taking the easy way out is all. Please feel free to pm me too, I am a very open person to hearings all sides, promise you that. None of this is easy...

    Edited: I am having issues with quoting, this response was in reference to Siennafire's response to my quote...sheesh
     
    #48 Mabel, Aug 30, 2017
    Last edited: Aug 30, 2017
  9. Stuck42

    Stuck42
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2017
    Messages:
    50
    Likes Received:
    22
    Location:
    Midwest
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    If I wanted to PM someone for advice..where would I go to do that? I can't find a message place..
     
    #49 Stuck42, Aug 30, 2017
  10. Stuck42

    Stuck42
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2017
    Messages:
    50
    Likes Received:
    22
    Location:
    Midwest
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Also...have you all felt that urgent draw to someone? Like you HAVE to touch them when you are near them? I feel that when we are together..we cuddle and talk and are always touching. It's heaven. So then when we part ways and the communication stops it's jarring to say the least. We both go back to our lives and husbands and kids..but it's not easy to put it out of my mind.
     
    #50 Stuck42, Aug 30, 2017
  11. RJay

    RJay
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2017
    Messages:
    932
    Likes Received:
    1,361
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    YES! In my case, it has happened with the woman I have crushed on all summer. She is straight, and I haven't even told her how attracted I am to her. BUT, at some point, I stopped being able to contain myself, and I started doing stuff like stroking her hair, touching her face, touching her fingers across the table. She never stopped me, but never pulled away, but also didn't reciprocate. It's a long story everybody here knows from another thread. But, YES, that irresistible urge to touch, even just her hair, is sooooo powerful and scary and shocking. Because I never felt like that about anybody before. Because, DUH, I'm gay, and I was only ever with men... well, actually just ONE man. Blech!
     
    #51 RJay, Aug 30, 2017
    Stuck42 likes this.
  12. Stuck42

    Stuck42
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2017
    Messages:
    50
    Likes Received:
    22
    Location:
    Midwest
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Well mine is def NOT 100% straight! We have been intimate on many occasions. As you read through this thread..I'm just deeper into it than she is. Trying to figure it out with her (with the help of awesome people on here) and trying to figure my own self out at the same time.
     
    #52 Stuck42, Aug 30, 2017
    RJay likes this.
  13. BosiMalkia

    BosiMalkia
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2017
    Messages:
    156
    Likes Received:
    42
    Location:
    Florida
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    No, fortunately for me, I have never expressed my feelings in a touchy way, not until I knew for sure about what our titles are
     
    #53 BosiMalkia, Aug 30, 2017
  14. Stuck42

    Stuck42
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2017
    Messages:
    50
    Likes Received:
    22
    Location:
    Midwest
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Oh! And I saw your thread about the new girl who plays street hockey! I'm following your thread too! Now I want to know what happens with the wine!!
     
    #54 Stuck42, Aug 30, 2017
    RJay likes this.
  15. RJay

    RJay
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2017
    Messages:
    932
    Likes Received:
    1,361
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I know! Hey, at least you got further than I did. But if this ends, I promise you will be OK!
     
    #55 RJay, Aug 30, 2017
    Stuck42 likes this.
  16. BosiMalkia

    BosiMalkia
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2017
    Messages:
    156
    Likes Received:
    42
    Location:
    Florida
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I think if you click on your profile and then messages, you should see private message
     
    #56 BosiMalkia, Aug 30, 2017
  17. Stuck42

    Stuck42
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2017
    Messages:
    50
    Likes Received:
    22
    Location:
    Midwest
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    You guys are great! I hope I can continue to talk to you on this thread! I will keep you updated on anything that happens with my girl (Just TYPING that made me smile) I'm a lost cause I'm afraid. Lol
     
    #57 Stuck42, Aug 30, 2017
    RJay likes this.
  18. RJay

    RJay
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2017
    Messages:
    932
    Likes Received:
    1,361
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Believe me, I want to know too! HAHA!
     
    #58 RJay, Aug 30, 2017
    Stuck42 likes this.
  19. Mabel

    Mabel
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2017
    Messages:
    186
    Likes Received:
    204
    Location:
    New England
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Yay quotes worked this time! I tried to pm you. It said I could not, I'm new so maybe that's why? Again, please feel free to pm me. I'm not adverse to hearing all sides...
     
    #59 Mabel, Aug 30, 2017
  20. RJay

    RJay
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2017
    Messages:
    932
    Likes Received:
    1,361
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Oh god, you are in the right place. SOOOOOO many of us fall for straight women or otherwise unattainable women or women who don't feel like we do. I think it's because we are new to this, and our feelings are extra intense, and we are somewhat vulnerable. A month ago, I thought I would literally DIE if I couldn't be with my crush. Right now, I think I'm kind of OK, and the fact that I'm looking at somebody else shows that I am doing much better.
     
    #60 RJay, Aug 30, 2017
    zumbaqueen, dreamingfreely and Stuck42 like this.
(You must log in or sign up to post here.)
Page 3 of 5